I’m about to sound like everyone’s dad here, but I’ll make my PSA of the day: Porn is a big fucking problem for most guys getting into the game (and even some who have been in a while) as it is WAY too easy to go to pornhub than it is to stay disciplined and eager to get out and game.
This was a huge problem for me when I was starting out in game. I would study all of this stuff, know how to open, push/pull….all the technical know how from beginning to close. Even had a few great references experiences to remind myself that “Damn right I can do this shit.”
It would certainly be cool to get the hot chicks, but when it came time to be an icy stone cold closer who gets it done, my drive was just not there. Why? I had jacked off 5 nights in a row (sometimes twice in a day) to porn and when it came time to do the real thing, I didn’t really care all that much. Worse, I wrote it off as “Oh well, I’ll get them next time” or some rationalization that doing that shit wasn’t really hurting me.
Even worse? When I did hook up, I almost NEVER came during sex. Because I had trained my body to only come from switching between 4 or 5 sex scenes in 2 minutes plus a certain way I liked to grip myself plus stand a certain way….is all of this TMI? (Hope you’re not reading this, mom!)
If you are not HUNGRY for pussy, you will put in below average to zero effort. Having that hunger helps get you through the learning curve, makes you want to work for it. That’s the stuff that can’t be taught and, IMHO, the reason that most guys give up before they get the results. They read something on here or go to a bootcamp and, because they are pushed there and it’s the norm to approach, they get some good results. Then when they are on their own, they slump back to where they were before. Why? Porn probably plays a big number in it.
Alternatives: jack off with days in between (or 2-3 days is better) to bikini pics on instagram or playboy still photos (non guy/girl penetration photos). Treat jacking off like a jewelry heist…get in and get out (10 minute max). The HQ threesome videos are too addicting for your brain, and are gonna fuck your shit up in ways you probably don’t even realize.
It’s been a minute since my last post here! Happy Holidays!!!
good to read a post from you again PBS, you inspired me to get out there early on & push through barriers it seemed like I never would. Changes have been massive, big thanks for your comments. How’s your journey & where has it taken you?
Having experienced ED from porn addiction myself, & having tried to quit many times before finally getting 4 months down the road without watching porn & seeing the results, I would suggest a total ban on jerking to any kind of imagery. Most have prob already seen the Your Brain On Porn site – http://ow.ly/GcKn6 – the research & testimonials of recovered addicts seems to point to doing away with all visual stimulus, even making an effort to cut down on fantasizing as much as possible & jerk as little as possible, at least until you’ve got back to getting spontaneous wood & being able to have sex like you used to.
Cool man, glad I could help! Truth is…im just an average guy who pushed thru all the times that didn’t seem to “click” because a) I knew i could do it and b) wanted it badly. I still get rusty from time to time but my ability to shake it off is quick.
My entitlement is high, which sort of feeds a positive feedback loop. Im in a much smaller enviornment now than I was when starting out (still an oasis of hotties… It’s nice :)) but I will say the ability to be in a big city when starting out was great becauwe I had so many opportunites to game and if I screwed up royally, no big deal on to the next bar.
But it’s hilarious now to watch these guys go after girls in this market…pathetic, really. “Do you guys come here a lot? Oh, that’s cool. We work for x. Wanna do a shot? We’re hitting an afterparty at our friends condo you should come!”
Seriously, that’s a cliff notes version of what im up against lol. An outline of what I do instead is not ask questions and instead make a simple observation, then just keep talking and saying rediculous shit. Then agree and acknowledge that all of these guys around here are lame. Get to the hook point, pull back and tease harder, and bam we’re off to the races. All the while knowing im the fucking best and it’s not even close
In short to most guys starting, just get out there and focus on being interesting/different/non-needy first. That alone will help you in more ways than one: you’ll learn to at least be friends with girls and vibe with them, then afterwards you can bring sexual intent to the ones that YOU CHOOSE. But the main thing is that you have some good female friendships with hot girls because then, yes, hot chicks are definitely what you are aiming to fuck but it’s no big deal because you are around it all the time casually anyway.
I have three really hot girl friends that I have never made a move on and never will. Why? Because it’s nice having a a few hot friends plus the feeling that I don’t have to try to fuck EVERY hot chick I see. And, it helps slightly ;) when you walk in a room with a hot girl laughing and being relaxed. EVERYONE takes notice, and opening becomes a tad more easier.