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When Beta Male Strategies Can Work

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via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 31, 2012 at 5:22 pm
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True shit. This is also why chicks can’t grasp that asshole alpha game works. They forget about the fight they had and just remember the banana in their purse or the voicemail rap. They don’t realize that that shit would go horrible if they weren’t already attracted to the guy, so they give other guys shitty advice like “leave her a sweet message” when the guy is nowhere near in the position where that would be a good move.

After a year of casually fucking a chick (I liked her and we had great chemistry, but I didn’t want a serious relationship at the time), I brought her a tea at her work because she had a cold. It was like the one nice thing I did for her in an entire year.

Months later I found out she had saved the teabag wrapper the way a girl flattens and saves flowers.

She would probably tell a guy to take care of a girl to woo her, but the reality is that tea wouldn’t have meant anything without all the stuff that built up to it. (and probably would have come off as supplicative/beta if I had done it right when we met)



A Little Pain Warms The Female Heart

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via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 30, 2012 at 5:31 pm
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Betas make a woman’s emotions go:

——–

What gets them wet is:

/\/\/\/\/\/

There’s a reason they watch Soap Operas (“he’s such a good guy, omg now he’s possessed by his brother’s ghost and evil, omg he’s a good guy again, oh no there was a car accident!!”) and Twilight (“he loves her, but he might kill her, but he loves her and they want to be together, but they can’t because he just tried to bite her, omg omg!!!1″) and stay in abusive relationships (“omg he beat me, but he loves me, he beat me again but it was my fault, omg he bought me flowers see he’s just troubled”).

The hotter the girl, the bigger the emotional spikes she needs.

Related videos:

Frying her circuits (running her thru a bunch of polarizing emotions quickly, this shit works I used to use it a lot lol):
http://www.youtube.com/watchv=EAyHg4zKAWI#!

Creating massive drama (give her the fantasy, then take it away…this is for the hot girls, it’s overkill for the average ones):


  • YaReally
    on July 30, 2012 at 5:32 pm
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  • Tjackson
    on July 30, 2012 at 6:56 pm
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    Yareally, where can we read more of your writings? Other blogs, forums, websites? Same username? And by the way, thanks man. You’ve really helped me make positive changes in my life


    • YaReally
      on July 30, 2012 at 8:14 pm
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      Glad to have helped!

      I only post here and at rationalmale.wordpress.com though I went back and forth with Aunt Sue for like 5 pages starting at http://www.hookingupsmart.com/2012/06/03/relationshipstrategies/how-women-really-feel-about-male-dominance/comment-page-3/#comment-126856 which is a funny read in places because I keep countering everything she says with rational logic and her hamster keeps going haywire.

      I’m too lazy to start a blog and write articles and shit, I just like dropping in on already existing discussions. I mostly stick to Heartiste because this was one of the first Manosphere blogs I read and I like the “not afraid to go into the dark side” attitude here. The pussy “half-gamers” at places like sosuave or Roosh’s forum (not to be confused with Roosh’s blog itself, which I read) are painful to read because they try to pick and choose “dark” traits while trying desperately to keep their “I’m a don juan” politically correct reputations in-tact. “You can’t be half a gangster.” Heartiste is just like “fuck it, here’s some real talk, let’s get down and dirty” lol


      • corvinus
        on July 31, 2012 at 2:02 am
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        I used to go to sosuave.com years ago. For a while after I left, it was pretty crappy, basically degenerating into a bunch of snot-nosed highschoolers asking stupid “duh” questions about chicks, but from a cursory glance at their discussion board, CH is having a definite influence over there now.


        • YaReally
          on July 31, 2012 at 4:03 pm
          Original Link

          “a bunch of snot-nosed highschoolers asking stupid “duh” questions about chicks”

          To me, they are just waaaaay behind in pickup tech. And I get the vibe that they pride themselves on that, because they don’t want to be evil manipulative horrible “PUAs”, they want to be smooth “Don Juan’s” which are SO much better than PUAs…reality is that’s all just ego bullshit and it’s holding them back from exploring the deep psychology that PUAs have explored. It’s like they won’t dare cross certain White Knight lines under any circumstances, so they struggle to piece together shards of half of a system to try to make it work. Reality is, you have to cross the lines to know where they are and to fully understand something you have to explore the dark side of it as well as the light…PUAs will often be like “Okay, here’s something super fucked up I found you can do…Don’t do it, I don’t do it anymore, but try it it works and it’s fucking crazy!!” and then we break down why that stuff works.

          The RSD forum crowd is the other end of the spectrum…they’re like “how can I just fuck a girl’s mind as much as possible hahaha take that bitches!!!!” lol

          Before pickup went mainstream the main forum was more of a middle-ground between pushing boundaries to learn but pulling it back to be socially calibrated. The fasterseduction.com forum is probably the one I’d send new guys to these days…it’s a spin-off of fastseduction.com which was the original huge PUA board and has some oldschool PUAs on it so it tries to keep a similar middle-ground attitude.


      • SheCantSayNo
        on July 31, 2012 at 10:27 am
        Original Link

        YaReally,

        To the Fast-Tracking Familiarity post from a while ago you responded with:

        “This concept of familiarity goes beyond seduction of women, it’s a good people skill in general. You can use it to get a girl opening up about her bisexual experiences and what color underwear she’s wearing 2 minutes after meeting her, or you can use it to land yourself a job in an interview or free drinks from AMOGs or get help from strangers or help people who are depressed.

        I make guy-friends easily because I build a connection with them quickly. Often it’s guys with high status that are intrigued (so I get job offers, invites to stuff, introduced to their social circles, etc) because they’re used to playing the fake-polite-persona game with other high status guys where everyone is kind of bullshitting eachother and you don’t really get to know the other person’s real personality for a while. Then I come in and plow through all that and show I’m not putting on a front (authenticity) so they drop their persona and we connect deeper and faster (no homo) than normal to them which is a surreal experience to them and they grasp at keeping in touch because they know they just ran into something special (no homo lol)”

        How do you build these quick connections with random people? In addition to going out alot, what would you advise people wanting to learn this? How/what to practice, what to focus on, etc.


        • YaReally
          on July 31, 2012 at 5:05 pm
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          Here come’s a biggun:

          “How do you build these quick connections with random people?”

          Juggler’s Method was probably the best for learning this.

          (I’m not sure if this is Juggler’s actual book, or just some guy’s summary of the method, but either way Juggler doesn’t seem to be selling the book anymore so this is the only way to access this VERY useful/important comfort/social-vibing technique information):

          http://www.scribd.com/doc/50510219/Dimitri-MyJugglerMethod-compact

          There’s 65 pages worth of learning what you want to learn. :)

          Of course these days most people just want the instant magic pill, so here’s a really basic summary of how I do it:

          - Be authentic with them. Don’t tell them what you think they want to hear, tell them exactly what you think/feel, and don’t backtrack or apologize for it. They’ll respect you for it, even if their beliefs are totally the opposite, and they’ll know you respect them enough to not bullshit them.

          - Similarily, cut through their bullshit. Most people will try to front, it’s okay to call them out on it and let them know that you know (because you’re socially calibrated and you’ve met a lot of people) that you know what they’re REALLY thinking.

          - Relate to what they’re saying and show them you “know that feel bro”. If they talk about how they just got dumped, think back to a time you got dumped or a friend of yours got dumped, and tell that story and use that to relate to how they feel/felt. This starts creating an “us VS them” mentality (you and whoever you’re talking to are in a special bubble VS the entire world who just can’t relate to the feelings you two are bonding over)

          - Ask them questions about their situation and vibe over their answers. Answer any questions they ask you with 100% honesty. Them asking you questions is them investing in you.

          - Then start to re-direct the conversation and lead them to somewhere positive. This is like coming out of a tragedy together, you instantly bond with the other survivors because you’ve gone through a lot of emotions together. Most people will just sit and stew in one emotion all day, so you need to be the guy that turns things around into something that leaves them feeling good. They’ll assosciate you with those good feelings.

          - Now you’re best buddies.

          Essentially what you’re doing is pacing their reality, then directing it. Like you see someone jogging while you’re running so you slow up to jog with them and encourage them to run with you so when you speed up to a run (or slow to a walk) they join you.

          A few quick scenarios so you can see how this is applied:

          Shy dude at the bar:
          PUA (can tell the guy feels awkward): “This place is loud, hey?” (I know that feel, bro)
          Dude: “Ya I can’t even talk in here…”
          PUA: “How are we supposed to get laid if we can’t even talk to girls?? lol” (authentic, know what he’s thinking)
          Dude: “lol”
          PUA: “Personally I love the girls here, they’re gorgeous, but I hate trying to talk to them in this place.” (relating)
          Dude: “I wouldn’t even know what to say to them…”
          PUA: “Well on the plus side, even if you say stupid shit, they probably can’t hear how dumb it is. :) ” (redirect positively)
          Dude: “lol!!”

          And now you’re best buds.

          Angry guy who just got cheated on by his girl:
          Dude: “Grrr I’m gonna kick that guy’s ass…”
          PUA: “Woah dude, you’re angry as fuck, it’s killin my mojo here what’s up man?” (authentic, know what he’s thinking)
          Dude: “Fuck off man, I’m in a shitty mood.”
          PUA: “No shit lol what happened dude?” (authentic, asking Qs)
          Dude: “My girl cheated on me and I’m gonna kill the guy she cheated with, he’s just some scrawny little faggot”
          PUA: “Ah fuck man, sorry. A buddy of mine just found out his girl cheated a month ago and he’s been drinkin his face off all month. The worst part is the guy she cheated with is ugly as FUCK lol Why do girls always pick the shittiest guys to cheat with?” (relating, share a story, I know that feel bro)
          Dude: “It’s fucking bullshit, I could kill this kid with one punch”
          PUA: “lol probably, you’re huge as fuck dude. But shit, I say if a girl wants to trade down to some loser then good riddance. There are probably 5 chicks who look just like her in this bar and they’ve probably got better taste. That’s why they’re here, dying for us to fuck them lol” (authentic, share a story, re-direct)
          Dude: “lol I just want my girl. :(
          PUA: “ahhh I hear that man. But fuck it, not gonna’ get her back tonight. Tonight should just be about drowning your sorrows, lemme buy ya a shot ’cause I been there and all I wanted to do was get fucked up hammered lol” (authentic, relate, re-direct)

          And now you’re best buds AND you probably saved some dude from getting his ass killed lol

          Early on with a chick you wanna bang:
          Chick: “You just want to get in my pants.”
          PUA: “Well that’s true, I’m a guy after all lol We’re bad with that, especially at a meat-market like this hey? You and your girls must be getting hit on all night.” (authentic, relate, know what she’s thinking, etc.)
          Chick: “Ya it’s so annoying!”
          PUA: “lol I bet. Most guys are like “pffft whatever, you get free drinks out of it at least” but nothing is worse than getting a free drink but being stuck having to talk to some creeper just ’cause you don’t want to be rude and walk away. It’s never worth the drink lol” (know that feel bro, know what she’s thinking)
          Chick: “omg I know, it’s always the creepiest guys too”
          PUA: “Well the creepy guys are usually the most ballsy. I mean here I am talking to you and I’m obviously the creepiest dude in here ;) lol” (authentic, re-direct positively)
          Chick: “lol no you’re okay”
          PUA: “Just OKAY?? I am crushed–” (and take it from there with normal game)

          And now you’ve built a shitload of comfort in a short time with her and 180′ed her opinion of you and have a nice clear path to game her etc. etc.

          Flirty chick:
          Chick: “Come dance with me!!”
          PUA: “No way. My dancing is shit, and then you’ll think I’m bad in bed.” (authentic, share a story)
          Chick: “lol are you bad in bed?”
          PUA: “See? Now you’re thinking about it already. Now I’ll never get in your pants.” (authentic, know what she’s thinking)
          Chick: “lol as if you were gonna’ anyway!!”
          PUA: “You don’t have to play hard to get, I know you’re already in love with me and want to have 10,000 of my babies.” (calling her know, know what she’s thinking)
          Chick: “lol oh ya totally”
          PUA: “Careful, that’s how it starts. First you fall in love with me, then we have crazy wild monkey sex, then you get all clingy, and then I have to break your heart.” (know what she’s thinking, share a story)
          Chick: “lol I’d break YOUR heart.”
          PUA: “I bet you would. You must leave a trail of broken hearts wherever you go, toying with men like a puppet-master for your own evil amusement. There are probably like 3 guys in your group tonight who have a crush on you.” (relate, know what she’s thinking)
          Chick: “lol actually there IS one lol”
          PUA: “But you don’t want to hook up with him because he’d get all clingy and it’d be awkward?” (relate, know what she’s thinking)
          Chick: “I had that happen before!”
          PUA: “lol I know what that’s like. A few years ago I hooked up with a friend and she went from cool to stalker-city on me. Now we can’t even hang out ’cause it’s too weird.” (relate, share a story)
          Chick: “omg I hate when that happens”
          PUA: “Well in our case you’ll be fine. I’m totally not into you so there’s no way I’d stalk you.” (re-direct positively)
          Chick: “lol ya right, you love me”
          PUA: “I do love that ass. As for the rest of you, I dunno…lol” (keep re-directing and escalate sexually)
          Chick: “omg you’re such a jerk!!”

          And now you’ve built a shitload of comfort in a short time, and led the conversation toward sexual topics. She feels like you know and understand her and you’ve basically laid the groundwork for a casual fuckbuddy relationship with her.

          So there you go. A lot of the calibration in this (reading people’s body language and being able to put yourself in their shoes to understand what their perspective is at the moment) comes from going out and interacting with a ton of people. Spend a few months just working on your comfort/rapport game. I think some people recommend talking to people until you find at least one interesting thing about them, that kind of forces you to dig beneath the surface.

          Most people don’t run into this kind of deep connection, ESPECIALLY in a bar/club environment, so it really floors them when it happens. That’s what I mean about the “they grasp at keeping in touch because they know they just ran into something special (no homo lol)” thing. To me, as a PUA, it’s just another night out, just another set in the night. But to them it’s like, the one person who understands them that they’ll meet all year or ever in their life so it’s epic to them and they’ll chase it.

          It helps if you actually LIKE people and LIKE socializing lol If you don’t, then you should work on fixing that first. :)


          • YaReally
            on July 31, 2012 at 10:51 pm
            Original Link

            “That’s money. I’ve been in in sort of a rut in daygame lately because all of the numbers have been flakes. I knew I needed to do something to make myself a bit more memorable”

            Ya, usually the reason you get flakes is that you’re 1) not building enough comfort/rapport and 2) she’s not investing in you. I can aggressively push for numbers from a dozen girls each under a minute and that looks cool and my friends think it’s amazing but the reality is that it’s not solid game and probably all 12 of those numbers will flake.

            Try pushing for more of a connection, find SOMETHING about the girl to qualify her on. Like tweak your #-close to shit like “you’re funny, not many girls can make me laugh…we should hang out sometime.” Now her brain says you’re interested in her for more than the fact she has a pussy so it’s okay to meet up with you.

            Also spend a few months NOT asking for phone numbers. Make THEM ask YOU to keep in touch. ONLY take numbers if they push for it first. You’ll lose some cool chicks (whatever, abundance mentality lol) but you’ll learn to get them hooked to where they’re the ones chasing you and wanting to see you again. Once you have a girl hooked, she won’t flake. Once you nail this skill-set, then you can go back to asking for their number but with solid comfort/rapport mixed in and your conversion rate of #s to meetups will rocket upward.

            Good luck! I highly recommend reading that Juggler stuff.


          • YaReally
            on August 1, 2012 at 3:12 am
            Original Link

            “is that really how to handle a flirty girl asking you to dance???”

            Depends on what’s congruent for you. I have a bunch of my own routines to avoid dancing lol There’s two types of dancing:

            1) early on, when she wants you to just “dance” with her and her group or whatever. This is just gay friendly dancing or a dance-off and pretty much totally asexual. I avoid this like the plague because I don’t know how to dance well, I don’t like dancing, and I have no rhythm. Plus a girl will dance with you like this all night and still go home with someone else. She’ll even grind on you but it’s in a friend zone way or for her to show off and isn’t sexual at all for her. This is the scenario I meant in my example.

            2) later in the night when she wants to grind because she’s attracted to you and horny. This, I’ll do, because I like grinding and it’s easy to physically escalate there.

            Some guys can dance all hip-hop breakdancy and shit and that’s cool, good on em. But if they don’t escalate that dancing with some game they just end up sweaty and alone at the end of the night.


          • YaReally
            on August 1, 2012 at 4:32 pm
            Original Link

            You’ll do fine, you have the right attitude. And the “rudely imposing my reality on them” is what’s happening…once you have a connection then it’s not rude.

            In a group go for the leader first, or go for your target first but be VERY aware of who and where the leader is so that the instant you can tell the leader is wondering “who the fuck is THIS guy?” you can initiate the interaction with them and introduce yourself, win them over, then go back to your target.

            All people care about is judgement. So in a group people put up a front because no one is ever really who they are around their group, everyone is putting on a facade to get social approval. Oddly, the most honest group you’ll ever meet are a 2-set of young girls who are BFFs, because they’ll both fuck guys, cheat on BFs/husbands, etc around eachother and won’t judge eachother. Put those same girls in a group of their mutual friends and they’ll be perfect angels.

            So ideally you want to isolate your girl from her group ASAP. Win the leader over so the group won’t cockblock you (this can even involve ignoring your target to focus on the rest of the group for a bit first) and then venue change your girl, even if all it is is “let’s go get a drink” and you walk her to the bar across the room.

            Hell, isolation can be as simple as taking a few steps to the side so that she rotates so her back is to her group, or you pull her just a few steps off to the side to sit at a table or whatever. Once you have isolation where she doesn’t feel like what she says will be judged by her peers, you can start building a connection easier.

            You can DO it in the middle of a group but it’s not optimal, there are way more distractions and random variables to worry about. Plus if you’re really breaking thru to her core as a person, that can be embarrassing for her, that someone can call her out on the facade she’s spent her whole life building, so they’re more comfortable being in private for that.

            An exception is the loud in-your-face aggressive attention-whore cockblock girl. Calling these girls out in front of the group can rock her world and make her feel silly enough to calm the fuck down and act like a normal person lol but it can also backfire hard if you don’t have the personality type to handle the fallout (I do, I love these girls) so I don’t recommend it.

            Hope that helps. This stuff I’m saying is really old school tight game principles. Like the fundamentals of pickup. Win over the leader, isolate your target, build comfort/rapport, once you pass the hook point then go for the close. These days there’s so many ideas and techniques and styles out there that people often forget or gloss over the little details of solid game that we have to make sure are in there, and it helps to step back and go “okay I need to return to the basics for a bit.” :)

            Good luck!


  • Whammer
    on July 30, 2012 at 9:04 pm
    Original Link

    Of course all of this talk about “hotgirl” traits is just BS because all females behave in the same way whether hot or fugly. The reason that you always talk about hotgirls is because these are the females you can’t get regardless of all your “pickup” training by the guy in the goofy hat. All of these so called “game” techniques are just a rationalisation for why you can’t get the top females. Oh I know! I’m not giving her enough drama, or pain or blah blah blah :) Of course, the real reason is that some men just naturally have a combination of traits that appeal to all females (you don’t) and no amount of book learnin’ is going to make you an Alpha. Keep dreaming.


    • YaReally
      on July 30, 2012 at 10:17 pm
      Original Link

      lol who the fuck is this dipshit?

      Trolling used to mean something lol


      • corvinus
        on July 31, 2012 at 2:25 am
        Original Link

        The guy trolling the troll actually makes things (slightly) interesting


        • YaReally
          on July 31, 2012 at 3:16 pm
          Original Link

          It’s all so meta lol



Days of Broken Arrows
on July 30, 2012 at 8:03 pm
Original Link

This also explains why so many women are vegetarian or vegan. First there’s the potential drama about telling people about the “label” and second, it’s all a way they can live under an iron fist when there’s no man around to provide one. This also explains women’s obsession with religions with odd rules, exercise “regiments” etc.


  • YaReally
    on July 31, 2012 at 12:17 am
    Original Link

    lol you make a good point actually.



Anonymous
on July 30, 2012 at 9:15 pm
Original Link

Excellent reply to my pregnancy question.

My fundamental issue is Alpha / Beta game vs. masochism defense game with 18-23 yo 10′s. This site has an empowering message that with just enough alpha/beta game, you can avert infidelity and becoming an R-pat. This is simplistic. Your enemy isn’t just your own betaness, it is her masochism.

For example, she does a nuclear shittest, you deftly counter with dread game. Stupid Alpha move. When you leave for the night thinking you are scaring her, she calls your bluff and fucks your friend.

What’s funny is this guy emailed about a 19 year old who “refused to wear an engagement ring because people are judgmental” You leave your 19 year old fiance alone and you think she’s going to wear an engagement ring?

Same problem with your “Alpha” coke parties. Now you’re dealing with coke fueled shit tests with your teenage masochistic LTR and you’ll be lucky if the cops don’t show up. You like being “dominant” and tying her up and encouraging her masochism? Wait till she fulfills her gang bang fantasy while you are on a business trip and she’s pissed you left her alone.

Alpha boy likes flirting with other girls in front of her? Wait for her to retaliate and she’s hitting on a male model. I hope you are secure.

Marriage and knocking her up seems beta, but it is good defense game with limited alpha options. Not perfect, but it does reduce her self-destructive impulses. Your theory above vindicates that pregnancy tames hot young girls who are otherwise always on the cusp of blowing up their lives.

The reality is that dating 18-23 model types with marriage potential is a harrowing ordeal that is more defense game than Alpha game. One infidelity from a stupid girl and you just blew your future wifey and how many years of your monogamy. There is no room for error when the stakes are this high.

If R-pat were married to her, knocked her up and didn’t run off to the other side of the country, his tight defense game would have probably prevented the infidelity and maybe cooled her masochism. Truth though is that R-pat is alpha and happy she cheated to dump the bitch when his agent wouldn’t let him for fear of pissing off his fans.


  • YaReally
    on July 31, 2012 at 3:28 pm
    Original Link

    Tyler Durden used to suddenly angrily break up with his GFs before traveling. They’d be so obsessed thinking about him and worrying and trying to get him to call them back that they didn’t have the time or inclination to cheat.

    A little sociopathic but smart lol



Reader Mailbag: First Things First Edition

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via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 27, 2012 at 5:34 pm
Original Link

Email1: Heartiste is dead on. He nailed every point you fucked up in. Don’t feel bad, you’re giving it a go and that’s half the battle. The awkwardness you feel at work now is a big part of why we try not to shit where we eat lol the correct response to “I have a boy story” is “I so completely don’t care lol”. Same way you’d respond if I told you I have all these cool unicorn facts to share with you. You’re a 38yo man, you have more important shit going on in your life than waiting (overnight!!) to hear about some young chick’s silly drama.

She mentioned she was seeing an older man, which was good for you until you repeatedly dug your hole deeper and deeper lol. It’s all good man, now you know how subtle a shit-test can be and you’ll be on the lookout in the future. …hopefully lol

Email2: She wants to fuck. She mentioned the BF to alleviate her guilt and avoid ASD (hey I TOLD him, so anything that happened after that wasn’t MY fault!!).  On top of it she called him her BF instead of Fiancé. Because fiancé might scare you off but BF might not and she doesn’t want you to be scared off.  ”oh but she said she hides the ring because people–” no, shut up lol look at what she does not what she says.

If you didn’t care about the GI you could bang her brains out till he gets home.  And in fact you wouldn’t even get caught…except OH NO WAIT you gave her your Facebook so now if her guy finds out and rages he and his buddies have your photo, your full name, a list of your friends, possibly your address and phone number and place of employment. STELLAR PLAN! lol

Don’t ever give your personal info to a girl with a significant other, jeezus lol

You can still fuck her (her kiss at the end was her signal) but you’re approaching it in a gay way. You are her monkey branch, she’s lining you up. Do you think she’s going to break up and call off a WEDDING and then Facebook message you and say “hey so do you want to get coffee?” when you might have moved on by then?  Hell no. If you were fucking her regularly (ie – the monkey’s hand is gripping the next branch) she could leave him for you.

But then you’re the guy who broke up a relationship and ruined two lives for a girl that you just want to bang, not marry (I presume).  There are a lot of moral issues for you to consider in what you’re doing.  I have my own code of what situs I’ll pursue and what ones I won’t but I learned that about myself from being in these situs a bunch of times and they’re based on my own personality and beliefs. You need to figure out your code of ethics not just for this girl but for these situations in general.

If you say “I’ll only cheat with a girl if we won’t get caught cause I don’t wanna get beaten up” I won’t call you a pussy. If you say “I can’t help a girl cheat especially on a fellow GI so I won’t do it” I won’t call you a pussy. But if you say “I DUNNOOOOO maaaaybe?  Umm how about we trade facebooks?  Is this a good idea? I dunno I’m just a plastic bag blowing in the wind, I don’t know anything about myself or have any personal code of conduct because I don’t really know what I’m doing” I’ll call you a pussy.

Like you wrote “I think we’re probably headed for–”…does that sound like you’re leading the interaction like a man toward your goals?  Or does that sound like you’re just waiting for her to hopefully lead it where you want?  I don’t know anything about army stuff but do you want the guy in charge of your troop saying “alright listen up we’re heading to this position let’s go” or do you want him saying “gee guys I think we might end up over here maybe? What do you think?”

Email3 (and the guy in this comment section who has the same problem): you’re making them feel like a slut and it’s triggering their Buyer’s Remorse.  Usually the situation comes up from acting cold after sex.  Like banging for a few weeks and then just not contacting her again for a month. Or after your first hookup you “play it cool” and don’t txt her with a “had a good time get home safe babe” after she walks out your door etc.

Think back over your interactions from the period where you jizzed to where she wanted a no-sex date. Somewhere in there, consistently with all the girls this is happening with, you’re making her feel like a slut that you just want sex from.

As far as how to handle it follow Heartiste’s advice with the pushing it then freeze-out. Definitely don’t let them stay over.

If you want to get all “dark triad”, Mystery had a good routine where he’d say “No nothing’s wrong I guess. I’m just attracted to girl’s who aren’t ashamed of their sexuality and I thought you were that type which is why I liked you but now you’re playing this weird “I don’t want to have sex” game and it’s sort of silly to me. I’m just not really feeling like having you stay over tonight, it’s nothing personal I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to do. I guess I just thought you were more interested in me beyond friendship is all.” which is a big mind-fuck lol. I’ve used variations of this. Don’t use it unless you have to cause it’s an invite for a lot of drama and a big dramatic conversation.

Email4: use a shit-ton of lube. Tooooooons. And use a condom so you don’t end up having to read babynames.com

Email5: what you feel, she feels. If you think they’re a threat, she will too. 90% of guys, especially her orbiters and your bros, have no game. Even if they flirt they’d never be able to take it all the way to sex. Now if she thinks “my BF gets insecure when Bob flirts with me…I wonder why, I thought Bob was a loser beta I just jokingly flirt with but if BF is worried about him he must know something I don’t…I wonder if Bob has a huge cock?  Maybe he’s a player…BF wouldn’t be worried if Bob didn’t bang girls like me all the time…”

See what I’m sayin?  No jealousy, no insecurity. Treat these guys the way you’d treat your 12 year old brother flirting with your GF.

Email6: what Heartiste said.

Email7: that’s a man, baby!



Days of Broken Arrows
on July 27, 2012 at 5:41 pm
Original Link

Email#1
she said that she had a boy story for me….

To which he replied, “What are you, in fifth grade? A ‘boy story??’ Let’s talk when you learn to speak like an adult. Bye”

A good way to judge when a woman is “playing” you is when she says things in a way a man could never get away with. This “baby talk” bullshit she’s throwing down in a prime example. I don’t care WHAT her story was, he needed to reframe.

Then he needed to cut her off for a while.

My lord, this whole thing pisses me off. What a stupid fucking manipulative cunt. She clearly needed a (metaphorical) bitch-slapping and knows it. She’ll only be happy with a guy who calls her on her retard shit. This girl better be hot as fuck because very little justifies her cutesy “boy story” routine followed by NOT giving him her digits.


  • Days of Broken Arrows
    on July 27, 2012 at 5:51 pm
    Original Link

    Addendum: I’ve noticed a lot of really horrible women use the word “boy” when they mean men. This is a “tell.” The very phrase “boy story” should have set of red alerts.

    Language reveals us. “Boy” is a favorite word on feminist blogs. It seems cute on the surface, but it’s really a way to trivialize and demean men. Any woman who uses “boy” when she means “man” has control-freak issues, an agenda, or all of the above.


    • YaReally
      on July 28, 2012 at 7:25 am
      Original Link

      When I fuck girls who have BFs/finances/husbands I make sure to only refer to them as her “boy”. Like “lol did your boy ask where you were?”. I’ll also only refer to myself as a man. “liar. you know you love it when a man takes charge”. It doesn’t matter if he’s older than me, bigger than me, more successful as a man than me, he’s just a “boy”.

      Language is powerful.



Brock Vond
on July 27, 2012 at 8:03 pm
Original Link

I disagree strongly with the advice you give in Email #5.

The last poor chump I cuckolded tried exactly this strategy; when he noticed his girlfriend was spending more time with me than with him, he tried to engage in exactly this kind of playful teasing. It backfired and I fucked her multiple times (and he never found out).

Now, I’m willing to concede that the failure of strategy on his part might be due to other factors (lack of proper alpha bearing, etc.), but to be honest, I think he fucked up by consciously calling attention to a dynamic of sexual tension between me and his girlfriend that she was otherwise trying to repress or ignore.

My contention is: this act of dismissive teasing only works with real Alphas because of outcome independence and non-attachment; it’s not a strategy to keep the girl from cheating, it’s a real manifestation of his indifference should she actually go through with it.

However, Betas who consciously attempt to implement it as a preventative strategy are playing with fire. They’d be better off with an ultimatum, and then dumping the bitch if she fails to comply.


  • YaReally
    on July 28, 2012 at 7:30 am
    Original Link

    “My contention is: this act of dismissive teasing only works with real Alphas because of outcome independence and non-attachment; it’s not a strategy to keep the girl from cheating, it’s a real manifestation of his indifference should she actually go through with it.”

    This is a very important point. It translates into other parts of game too…the jist is that when you do something to show outcome independence as a “technique”, it doesn’t work and/or backfires. Because doing it as a technique is being outcome dependent. You have to legit not care if you lose the girl and have an abundant mindset for it to work. Thus we promote having more than one girl on the go or at least be out regularly flirting so you keep that abundance mindset.



YaReally
on July 28, 2012 at 7:32 am
Original Link

Email1: Heartiste is dead on. He nailed every point you fucked up in. Don’t feel bad, you’re giving it a go and that’s half the battle. The awkwardness you feel at work now is a big part of why we try not to shit where we eat lol the correct response to “I have a boy story” is “I so completely don’t care lol”. You’re a 38yo man, you have more important shit going on in your life than waiting (overnight!!) to hear about some young chick’s silly drama.

She mentioned she was seeing an older man, which was good for you until you repeatedly dug your hole deeper and deeper lol. It’s all good man, now you know how subtle a shit-test can be and you’ll be on the lookout in the future. …hopefully lol

Email2: She wants to fuck. She mentioned the BF to alleviate her guilt and avoid ASD (hey I TOLD him, so anything that happened after that wasn’t MY fault!!).  On top of it she called him her BF instead of Fiancé. Because fiancé might scare you off but BF might not.  ”oh but she said she hides the ring because people–” no, shut up lol look at what she does not what she says.

If you didn’t care about the GI you could bang her brains out till he gets home.  And in fact you wouldn’t even get caught…except OH NO WAIT you gave her your Facebook so now if her guy finds out and rages he and his buddies have your photo, your full name, a list of your friends, possibly your address and phone number and place of employment. STELLAR PLAN! lol

Don’t ever give your personal info to a girl with a significant other, jeezus lol

You can still fuck her (her kiss at the end was her signal) but you’re approaching it in a gay way. You are her monkey branch, she’s lining you up. Do you think she’s going to break up and call off a WEDDING and then Facebook message you and say “hey so do you want to get coffee?” when you might have moved on by then?  Hell no. If you were fucking her regularly (ie – the monkey’s hand is gripping the next branch) she could leave him for you.

But then you’re the guy who broke up a relationship and ruined two lives for a girl that you just want to bang, not marry (I presume).  There are a lot of moral issues for you to consider in what you’re doing.  I have my own code of what situs I’ll pursue and what ones I won’t but I learned that about myself from being in these situs a bunch of times and they’re based on my own personality and beliefs. You need to figure out your code of ethics not just for this girl but for these situations in general.

If you say “I’ll only cheat with a girl if we won’t get caught cause I don’t wanna get beaten up” I won’t call you a pussy. If you say “I can’t help a girl cheat especially on a fellow GI so I won’t do it” I won’t call you a pussy. But if you say “I DUNNOOOOO maaaaybe?  Umm how about we trade facebooks?  Is this a good idea? I dunno I’m just a plastic bag blowing in the wind, I don’t know anything about myself or have any personal code of conduct because I don’t really know what I’m doing” I’ll call you a pussy.

Like you wrote “I think we’re probably headed for–”…does that sound like you’re leading the interaction like a man toward your goals?  Or does that sound like you’re just waiting for her to hopefully lead it where you want?  I don’t know anything about army stuff but do you want the guy in charge of your troop saying “alright listen up we’re heading to this position let’s go” or do you want him saying “gee guys I think we might end up over here maybe? What do you think?”

Email3 (and the guy in this comment section who has the same problem): you’re making them feel like a slut and it’s triggering their Buyer’s Remorse.  Usually the situation comes up from acting cold after sex.  Like banging for a few weeks and then just not contacting her again for a month. Or after your first hookup you “play it cool” and don’t txt her with a “had a good time get home safe babe” after she walks out your door etc.

Think back over your interactions from the period where you jizzed to where she wanted a no-sex date. Somewhere in there, consistently with all the girls this is happening with, you’re making her feel like a slut that you just want sex from.

As far as how to handle it follow Heartiste’s advice with the pushing it then freeze-out. Definitely don’t let them stay over.

If you want to get all “dark triad”, Mystery had a good routine where he’d say “No nothing’s wrong I guess. I’m just attracted to girl’s who aren’t ashamed of their sexuality and I thought you were that type which is why I liked you but now you’re playing this weird “I don’t want to have sex” game and it’s sort of silly to me. I’m just not really feeling like having you stay over tonight, it’s nothing personal I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to do. I guess I just thought you were more interested in me beyond friendship is all.” which is a big mind-fuck lol. I’ve used variations of this. Don’t use it unless you have to cause it’s an invite for a lot of drama and a big dramatic conversation.

Email4: use a shit-ton of lube. Tooooooons. And use a condom so you don’t end up having to read babynames.com

Email5: what you feel, she feels. If you think they’re a threat, she will too. 90% of guys, especially her orbiters and your bros, have no game. Even if they flirt they’d never be able to take it all the way to sex. Now if she thinks “my BF gets insecure when Bob flirts with me…I wonder why, I thought Bob was a loser beta I just jokingly flirt with but if BF is worried about him he must know something I don’t…I wonder if Bob has a huge cock?  Maybe he’s a player…BF wouldn’t be worried if Bob didn’t bang girls like me all the time…”

See what I’m sayin?  No jealousy, no insecurity. Treat these guys the way you’d treat your 12 year old brother flirting with your GF.

Email6: what Heartiste said.

Email7: that’s a man, baby!



The 5 Stages of Unplugging

Original Link

via Rational Male

YaReally
on July 25th, 2012 at 11:03 pm
Original Link

1) I think it says good things about what you’ve done with your blog that you’re able to link a bunch of your posts in each of the stages. Part of why I like this blog and consider it a good place for a lot of men to start unplugging is that you cover a wide spectrum of stages. The more hardcore PUA sites tend to start from “okay, you’re unplugged and ready to embrace this, let’s get crackin’” which is hard for a lot of new guys to get into.

2) I think a stage called Embracement could be added. It might be at a fork in the road where you either go toward Jaded or Embracement. Embracement would be where you finally accept that yes, this is how things work, but that’s not a bad thing and, in fact, you welcome it. You accept and understand people despite their human faults, and you can love women and the fact that they do crazy shit and why they do it. And just in general, you foster a love for your fellow human beings…you see that everyone is flawed despite the fronts we all try to put up, and you can accept them for who they truly are. It’s like an extremely honest way of living and people pick up on that non-judgemental vibe really quickly and are relieved to meet someone they can really be themselves around, and you embrace them for that. This is a hard feeling to describe, but that’s about the best I can do it. It’s pretty much the opposite of Jaded, but it requires passing through all those other stages to get to just like Jaded does.

3) I had so little experience around women till my early 20s that I never had an awakening moment. Girls were so completely foreign to me (I had never even TOUCHED a girl let alone kissed one or had friendships with one or anything till I was like 23) that when I found PUA stuff, my awakening moment was just when I first tried some techniques out and the girls I tried it on responded exactly how the PUAs said they would, repeatedly, and I realized there was some kind of logical formula going on under the surface of everything and that a person could tap into that and understand and manipulate it. I just thought that was fascinating. But I was never burned hardcore by a girl or cheated on or anything…I literally just got sick of being lonely and PUA offered a step by step guide of how to fix that lol

A positive side-effect of this is that I don’t have any bitterness or anything that a lot of guys coming into game have. If someone told you a dog was friendly and then when you pet it it bit you, you’d harbor resentment and feel betrayed. But I had never even seen a dog and someone told me “hey that dog might bite you” so when I met the dog I was fully prepared for the possibility of it biting me, so I wasn’t blindsided. This has made the mental shift to loving women in general despite their faults a lot easier for me than it is for like, a guy who lost his house and kids in a brutal divorce after his One True Love cheated on him with his best friend.

A negative side-effect is that I don’t have any reference experience of girls as platonic friends. I see EVERYTHING. When my buddy’s GF puts her arm around me at the bar as we chat, I know he says “she’s just flirty”, but I also know that, if I wanted to, I could escalate that fast. So there are a lot of situations where I have to sort of bite my tongue or excuse myself from the interaction because I just see too much of what’s going on that the other guys in my group can’t see because they’re still plugged in. Girls exist completely for sex to me, which is nice for getting laid, but it made building large mixed social circles difficult/awkward for me for a few years. Now I’ve got more of a handle on it, but a guy who grew up with female friends would’ve had a lot easier time with it.


What Kristen Stewart’s Cheating Tells Us About Good-Looking Beta Males

Original Link

via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 25, 2012 at 10:22 pm
Original Link

I’m not normally a super judgemental asshole about looks, but I make an exception for Kristen Stewart because goddamn she is so bad it’s actually painful for me to read articles/comments where people call her cute/hot/sexy. Like I can’t even comprehend the thought process involved in that. She is absolutely hideous to me. I get that girls like her because she’s completely plain and average and they can be like “that could be ME kissing Edward!!11″ but guys who spank it to Kristen Stewart? Seriously, wtf is wrong with you lol


  • YaReally
    on July 25, 2012 at 10:41 pm
    Original Link

    On a more constructive note, one of the comments left on that yahoo site says “Stewart commented not too long ago that her life was too easy and too boring. Guess the only way she was able to inject some interest in her life was to foul up someone’s marriage.”

    I’ve found that to be a driving force behind a LOT of fucked up behavior from some women. Specifically really attractive ones who find life just too easy. Everyone lets them get away with everything because, like a celebrity, they can do no wrong. It creates a feeling of restless boredom and like you aren’t a part of the “normal” world because people aren’t treating you the way they would treat someone who wasn’t as attractive/rich/important/famous/etc. as you.

    So they act up and do things that’ll specifically cause drama and piss people off just to feel “normal”. It’s a really interesting situation to me from a psychology perspective because most “normal” people will never experience that feeling or be able to understand or relate to it, and those people who have life “too easy” can’t bitch about it to normal people or they sound ungrateful so they just suffer in silence.

    I was banging a girl who would treat her best friends like absolute shit, she was DYING for them to get mad at her or yell at her or leave an angry facebook comment or just SOMETHING to make her feel normal, but they’d never do it because she was too hot and too high value in her social circles and the general nightlife for anyone to dare cross her.

    A lot of people (including this girl) end up going down the coke-head path because they’re chasing “feeling something”. That’s why a lot of really high-end social groups in the nightlife scene are full of coke-heads. Their day to day world is so full of phoney fake bullshit from everyone around them that they need to escape it for a few hours.

    The guys she banged were guys like me who treated her like a normal person and bitched her out when she acted up.

    Anyway, I don’t know if Stewart made out with a married guy around town repeatedly in broad daylight without wearing disguises or anything knowing paparazzi would be around on PURPOSE, but there were probably a lot of subconscious factors involved in why her little adventure was so recklessly executed.


    • Days of Broken Arrows
      on July 26, 2012 at 5:25 am
      Original Link

      Really perceptive stuff. Thanks for sharing the insight — people should remember this.

      It’s also a reason really nice looking women prefer Alpha teasing to Beta worship. It adds drama and “realness” to the bullshit world. This may be one of the best, most useful things written on this site yet.


      • wingwoman
        on July 26, 2012 at 7:03 pm
        Original Link

        Only the ones with boring lives. Men do it to by the way. Most peoples lives are so dull they need to create drama and bull to keep things interesting. I noticed this with the last guy I dated. He was to used to crazy bitches and drama, it made him paranoid.


        • YaReally
          on July 26, 2012 at 7:46 pm
          Original Link

          “Men do it to by the way. Most peoples lives are so dull they need to create drama and bull to keep things interesting.”

          Agreed. I know guys that do this too. It just looks more insane/ungrateful when girls do it because all it takes for society to hand a girl a bunch of free stuff and surround her with White Knights and beta orbiters is a pair of tits whereas guys have to do a lot more to get even half the ridiculous treatment an average to pretty girl gets, let alone a super hot 10. No girls have ever offered us guys free trips to foreign countries and thousands of dollars in bottle service etc, but those aren’t unusual things for really hot girls.

          Boring is also completely relative. Kristen Stewart can be bored with the celebrity life that most of her fans would find exciting and amazing.



What Kristen Stewart’s Cheating Tells Us About Good-Looking Beta Males

Original Link

via Heartiste

A1ADD1N
on July 25, 2012 at 11:26 pm
Original Link

“I was banging a girl who would treat her best friends like absolute shit, she was DYING for them to get mad at her or yell at her or leave an angry facebook comment or just SOMETHING to make her feel normal, but they’d never do it because she was too hot and too high value in her social circles and the general nightlife for anyone to dare cross her.”

That’s fucking pathetic; I’d love to crush her soul and laugh as she fails at revenge: “the beatings will continue, until morale improves” [so far my assholery goes unhindered. life is gooood]
_____________________________________________________

“She’s an ugly dopey bitch anyway. She’s no Gates McFadden!”

really you’re a fucking dweeb. your still a fucking dweeb even if that was a joke [horrible joke] i had to look that shit up. kill yourself
_____________________________________________________

Anonymous, he should have had the bitch broken to begin with, or just said the hell with this little piece of chicken. he is fucked no matter the reaction. saving face is not a defense; it’s a retreat.


  • YaReally
    on July 26, 2012 at 12:10 am
    Original Link

    “I’d love to crush her soul and laugh as she fails at revenge”

    Your internals are as unhealthy as hers were.



Harland
on July 25, 2012 at 11:59 pm
Original Link

I’ve just been placed in the position of either becoming super-alpha or being celibate for the rest of my life. Half my face became paralyzed last month (Bell’s palsy) and it’s not getting any better, so I can’t smile. How are chicks ever going to know that they’re cute? And humans are powerfully influenced by facial symmetry. Now, I have a “don’t give a shit” attitude because I’m no longer handsome. Hey, maybe it’s what I needed all along. I still hope I get better though.


  • YaReally
    on July 26, 2012 at 12:28 am
    Original Link

    There was a deaf PUA who would carry around a notepad and pen and use that to get around his deafness.

    You’ll find a way to overcome it. :)

    The facial symmetry thing is retarded, don’t ever think about that bullshit again, that’s not an actual thing despite what the nerds doing “scientific studies” will tell you.

    Far as the smiling goes, a lot of guys don’t even smile when they do pickup. There’s something to be said for the deadpan Ryan Reynolds, Robert Downey Jr in Iron Man, Hank Moody in Californication style humor where the girl is never really sure if you’re serious/joking so don’t sweat that too much.

    Personally I would start working it into a qualification routine really early in the interaction and instigate a situation where the girl says/does something funny/cute. You can’t smile, so I’d say flat out “that’s cute, I’d be smiling right now but I actually can’t, half my face is paralyzed right now.” She’ll think you’re bullshitting (one of my natural buddies is deaf in one ear and misses what girls say sometimes and he tells them he’s deaf but they always think he’s bullshitting at first, seen it a thousand times) and go like “ya riiiight” and you just go dead serious and say “No, seriously, it’s a Palsy thing, it started about a month ago. (pause for a sec while she gets that “oh shit I just made fun of a disabled person!!” look of terror on her face) …Now girls just think I’m an asshole when they talk to me, which oddly enough they seem to like lol” (relieving the tension of the situation for her)

    From there run normal game as usual and never bring your paralysis up to her again unless she asks questions about it. And if she asks questions, just answer 100% honestly/congruently. “Ya, it sucks, but you’re dealt the hand you’re dealt right?” It’ll probably actually help you build a lot of comfort/rapport really fast because when a girl knows a guy isn’t perfect she feels like she can open up about her own flaws more with him instead of putting on a facade.

    I’m not blowing smoke up your ass, I’m very serious about this. :)

    It’d work especially good if the other half of your face can still smile so you can do the half-smile grin/smirk at the “girls just think I’m an asshole” bit but even if you can’t it should go over fine once you get used to the delivery.

    Good luck! The fact that you’re even acknowledging that “becoming super-alpha” is a possible outcome from this situation tells me that you’re in a good headspace for overcoming it!



Anonymous
on July 26, 2012 at 5:12 pm
Original Link

The ironic thing about the beginning of the “Shut the fuck up and open” video from Tyler in Hawaii is that there is a set of hot women in bikinis right next to him for the first 2 minutes and he doesn’t he see them get up and leave while he repeats the same advice over and over to the camera. At least one of them was hot.


  • Anonymous
    on July 26, 2012 at 5:24 pm
    Original Link

    Watch the video at 10:09 when an HB9 and her friend, an HB8, march toward the camera from behind Tyler and then curve into the ocean to swim, while he’s oblivious to their existence, because he’s too busy teaching the viewer to “shut the fuck up and just do it” (open women):

    I’m not saying the video was an epic fail for all this, in fact I’m grateful that he produced this video and gave such great advice, however the irony was incredible.


    • YaReally
      on July 26, 2012 at 7:56 pm
      Original Link

      lol you understand he goes out like 7 days a week and is constantly hitting on girls, right? He’s shutting the fuck up and TEACHING in that video.

      Priorities, dude. Girls aren’t always top of the list. He’s literally talking about how he forces himself to “do the work” for his business, as he “does the work” for his business lol. If you want to just watch him hit on girls you can hit up the Hotseat program or watch a bunch of his free videos on YouTube where he’s hitting on girls.



Carlotta
on July 27, 2012 at 12:20 pm
Original Link

Heartiste, I would love to see a breakdown by you of the whole Kim Kardashiian/Kris Humphries/Kanye West triangle and then the upcoming Kris Jenner/Bruce Jenner/non-famous old boyfriend triangle that is now coming.

Someone pointed out some “game” theory with that show and I began watching it. As Kris started getting more involved in business it was fascinating to see that ….the hamster was indeed spinning. She does not allow him to sleep with her, he is not allowed to eat in certain rooms and she appears to be about to drop his butt.

I would love to hear your, sure to be hysterical, take on it.

I think it is a very good case study.


  • YaReally
    on July 27, 2012 at 3:18 pm
    Original Link

    Ya I agree. I’d also like I see an article about unicorns and Days of our Lives. Do you think being the reincarnated ghost of your ex-husband’s brother is a DHV?

    Go away girls, men are talking here, and no one in this comment section keeps up with the Kardashians.



Holmes: Another Lovelorn Beta Male Rampage

Original Link

via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 24, 2012 at 7:54 pm
Original Link

I’ve noticed that women and anti-game guys have reduced the “learning game might’ve helped prevent this” observation down to either “oh so it’s WOMEN’S fault he did this because they didn’t shower him with pussy since women obviously owe it to any man who wants pussy, you misogynist!!” or “oh ya the cure for every mental illness is banging some bar sluts, real nice idea there!”

I think people are overlooking the extent of how game and pickup, especially the way it’s taught nowadays, enhances a guy’s life overall. Aside from getting pussy, if this guy had learned to enjoy socializing and been given the tools to meet new people, he may have developed some healthy normal friendships and general human interaction in his life. The “he was a quiet guy who kept to himself” thing is harder to do when you have a social circle of friends who are inviting you out to dinners, movies, nights out on the town, ski trips etc.

I was a hermit myself after college for a few years. Pretty much no friends and rarely left the house. Now I have lots of social circles in different parts of the country and I can move to a new city and make a new social circle in a couple of weeks. Some of those friendships are just surface level “let’s party together” stuff but some of them have become good friends I talk to regularly.

It’s important to understand that to go from socially awkward to getting pussy you have to go through that middle ground where you learn to be a normal person who fits into society and that to get really good with women you need to learn how to ENJOY that normal socializing stuff. This is what PUA/game teaches and ya, crazy is still gonna crazy a lot of the time, but I think anyone who builds up healthy relationships in their life is in a much better position to avoid going down crazy paths or to get needed help to avoid this kind of thing. A guy sitting at home alone with YouTube clips of Joker looping 24/7 as he stockpiles guns doesn’t really have anyone to say “uh hey bro, wtf are you doing buddy? How about we go grab a beer instead?”


  • immoralgables
    on July 24, 2012 at 8:44 pm
    Original Link

    You speak the truth on that YaReally. I feel this could have been avoided if he had friends that he could rely on or that could tell him to quit being weird and invite him out for a happy hour or two. I’ve found that in the past, when I’ve tried to give a shit about how people are doing and to actively socialize, that the world opens up to you and you have more options socially. The first step is to actually care.

    *On another note, because you touted him around the ‘sphere so much, I started watching RSD and specifically TD’s videos via Youtube/RsdFreetour.

    At first thought I was opposed because I thought TD was a herb but he says really good shit and his philosophy is on point. Too many people (my included) rule him out because of his portrayal in “The Game” but he has actually gone and developed a more holistic point of view to developing game and becoming the person that you want to be. And really, who can argue against that.

    If you have any more vids of his or his camp that I won’t find via RsdFreetours on youtube pls let me know. I’m on the fence of watching the Blueprint Decoded so I’d appreciate your thoughts on viewing that after I watch the free shit.

    -I.G.


    • YaReally
      on July 24, 2012 at 9:36 pm
      Original Link

      ya, I know that if a buddy of mine goes through something awful (getting dumped, divorce, losing a friend to suicide, etc.) I make an effort to touch base with them a little more frequently so they have someone to vent to or make them laugh or agree that what happened to them was shitty but to keep their heads up etc. If this guy had had a few friends like that that he could even just bounce his views on society etc. off over a few beers and gotten some different perspectives etc., who knows?

      Tyler’s philosophy on life in general is great, he’s come a long way since The Game. You can find more of his vids under rsdtyler on Youtube, and at http://www.rsdnation.com/articles/all (other instructors have vids up there too, especially recently, but Tyler tends to be the one that hits more overall life philosophy discussion VS “how to create drama and juggle 10 girls at once” stuff). He also had a really good blog for a while at http://realsocialdynamics.blogspot.ca/ (the newest few posts are more about business related stuff, but dig back a page or two and there’s a lot of philosophy and social dynamics stuff in it).

      Blueprint Decoded is a mind-fuck. It’s not even going to help you get laid or anything probably lol it’s more hours and hours of Tyler’s observations and breakdowns of human psychology, group psychology, why people think and act the way they do, society, social conditioning, identity, values, etc. It’s really fascinating and ridiculously thorough if you’re into general human psychology, but it has very little in it that’s directly applicable to getting pussy. So if you like psyche in general, Blueprint will rape the hell out of the gay Psyche 101 class you might’ve taken in college that talked about Pavlov’s dog. The stuff Tyler talks about in the Blueprint will probably be taught in psyche classes a hundred years from now when the stigma of it being associated with “tricking helpless girls into bed” has worn off and people actually look at what he’s saying.


  • Red
    on July 25, 2012 at 2:24 am
    Original Link

    “I was a hermit myself after college for a few years. Pretty much no friends and rarely left the house.”

    I’m 20 and in pretty much the same situation as you were. Most of the advice I’ve seen on other sites is basically “Go out and make friends by being charming” or “Go join a club or get a job & meet people” etc, which isn’t very helpful since social awkwardness doesn’t just magically disappear once you go outside. Would you mind giving some tips on how you built social circles from nothing?


    • YaReally
      on July 25, 2012 at 11:05 am
      Original Link

      I embarrassed myself a shitload and put myself in a ton of awkward situations. :)

      There’s no easy way to do this. If you’re already a decently social guy who goes out a lot and stuff, it’s not that hard to sharpen your social skills. But if you’re basically a hermit who has maybe 3-5 close friends at the most and you don’t leave your computer room (I used to not leave my house for months at a time) let alone go to parties or anything, you’ve got a lot of work to do. Like it could take a solid year or two before you just get to the point where you can talk to strangers and make new friends, let alone start macking on girls.

      It’s not a big deal, a lot of us started from basically nothing. When I started I had moved to a new city, so I had literally no friends or anything. It was either go out by myself and force myself to ask people for the time, make small talk with store clerks, work up the balls to “cheers!” people at the bar, etc. or spend the next 60 years of my life alone. A year or two isn’t a big deal when you’re only 20, I didn’t start socializing till I was 23.

      Rent the movie “Yes Man” as well, it’s got a good philosophy. Don’t turn down any invites you get to do anything, even if you aren’t interested in whatever it is. Meetup.com might have some local clubs that are into some hobby of yours, try checking that out. Google BradP’s “Social Freedom” exercises too.

      It’s all baby steps but it’s worth it in the end. No one can or will fix you but yourself. :)

      And I always like this video for inspiration:


      • King A (Matthew King)
        on July 25, 2012 at 4:36 pm
        Original Link

        Everyone has a religion. You have no earthly idea how neutering this readymade spirituality is in the long run. For some clue, don’t look at preachers (which really should be enough), but look at the congregation. Those ghastly looking Comic-Con dudes do not need refinement, they need spiritual direction, and they’ve come to a mullet-headed charlatan for quenching.

        You cannot get wisdom from self-help seminars and Game For Dummies books. You can get excellent, practical tips, for sure — don’t get me wrong. But when they start wandering into motivation and the meaning of life bullshit, your radar should light up.

        I used to think that this was just a function of me being on the other side of the dividing line. Now I realize you just have holes in your souls, and you are trying to fill it up with the nearest pseudospiritual blather, like goth girls drawn to Wicca. Any man who is not “natural” enough to be put off by the tone of this display is a candidate for Marshall Applewhite’s comet ride. I don’t want to make fun of you so much as slap you across the face. You should expect better.

        Clearly game and pick-up requires an exit strategy that none of these snake-oil twerps ever thought far enough ahead to realize. As much as game might get a dissatisfied geek’s balls to finally descend, it has nothing to say about what to do after he locates his nuts, except, more, more, more, “for all eternity insatiably calling out ‘Da capo!’”

        Where are the naturals who didn’t need to overcome omegadom, who aren’t tempted to replace their former nerdery with a more sophisticated one?

        That said, the Mission Impossible music is really tight, bro! Will there be a graphic novel?

        Matt


        • immoralgables
          on July 25, 2012 at 5:24 pm
          Original Link

          @ Matt

          If YaReally has done a 180 and his happy with his current situation in life I would consider that a success.

          What would be the alternative to shunning what YaReally just said or suggested. He advocated going out and building up your social circle from scratch. I applaud that kind of effort but sure I can see why maybe Michael Jordan would scoff at Steve Urkel trying to get on his level.

          What would be your recommended course of action for someone trying to take themselves to the next level outside of game and trying to lay chicks? I think you have it in you to offer an alternative to YaReally’s solution.

          -I.G.


          • YaReally
            on July 25, 2012 at 8:28 pm
            Original Link

            “What would be your recommended course of action”

            lol king a doesn’t have any actual advice. He’s admitted as much himself, he tried to give actual practical useable advice in another article recently and it was embarrassingly bad.

            All king a has is a podium he sets up in various comment sections to announce how much better he is than everyone else while he masturbates over his own word-smithery.

            Meanwhile I’ve helped a handful of nerds I’ve met over the years get on the path to turning their social lives around with game principles and I’ve helped a handful of people (guys and girl’s in general) change their outlook on life to a healthier one to help get them out of depression, apathy, etc with general life self-help type principles (like the ones King A says are bullshit if they come from a guy like Tyler).

            Hell my current roommate, when I moved here was a quiet guy who rarely went out and just had a small circle of friends of his non-white race. Flash forward a couple years and now the guy pretty much owns the nightlife downtown. Bouncers/waitresses/bartenders/even the people who collect empty glasses at all the main clubs and misc bars/lounges know him by name and genuinely like him. Any bar we go to we run into at least 3-10 people who shout his name and run up to say hi, guys, girls, nerds, cool people, you name it. He’s practically a local celebrity here and we all joke about it. He’ll bar hop just to “do the rounds” and say his hellos to everyone and he’s got a bunch of different social circles now and makes new friends that come party with us all the time.

            He was a nice dude but just didn’t put himself out there much till I moved here and started encouraging him to go out and showing him that chatting up strangers is fun. He took the ball and rolled with it from there, I didn’t even expect him to turn into what he is now lol but he found that he enjoys social interaction and now his life is a 180 from before. He’s joined some hobby classes, has workout buddies, friends who invite him out to stuff, free access to clubs where the rest of us have to wait in line and pay cover etc.

            And that’s just ONE case I’ve watched blossom right in front of my eyes. This shit changes lives.


          • YaReally
            on July 27, 2012 at 3:56 pm
            Original Link

            @King A: so what you’re saying is: you’re better than everyone else.

            We all get it, you are a super natural alpha hero who spends his time gracing us mere common-folk with your presence. Will you ever have anything to contribute to the Manosphere besides dressing that same point up over and over in different verbal costumes?

            Maybe it’s time you took a break from the Internet, it must be VERY taxing to have to dumb yourself down so us peasants can understand you lol

            Seriously though, why do you even post? You clearly think you’re above everyone here, which would be fine if you helped them out, but you clearly have no intention of helping anyone so seriously, why are you here? Don’t you have friends you can talk to in real life?


        • YaReally
          on July 25, 2012 at 8:06 pm
          Original Link

          Oh look, it’s King A with another condescending post. Honestly dude I read the first few sentences and just don’t even have the energy to drudge through the rest of your silly shit today. I’m just saddened that we aren’t all as superior as you are, imagine what a wonderful world this would be if everyone was like King A.

          brb someone who teaches game can’t read Tony Robbins, Tolle, etc and then explain their concepts to someone else due to MAGIC lol I thought men used logic, are you sure you’re in the right Sphere?


          • YaReally
            on July 26, 2012 at 1:04 am
            Original Link

            Thanks, glad you find my shit helpful.

            I promote Tyler’s stuff only because it’s quality. I have no ties to any particular PUA group, and I’ve studied/practiced pretty much every style of game there is on my journey. I’ve done the extreme physical caveman game, I’ve done the 100% serious verbal comfort game, I’ve done the cocky/funny-all-the-way-to-the-bedroom game, I’ve done the “get the fuck away from me bitch, why are you such a retard?” abusive game, I’ve done the “god you’re gorgeous” apocalypse game, etc. etc.

            All I care about is: What works? If Tyler starts putting out retarded shit that doesn’t work or doesn’t help guys, I’ll stop linking his videos. If I come across a video by some other guy, even a King A type, that has legit useful shit in it, I’ll link that. All I care about is what works. What’s going to help guys digest the pill? What’s going to help direct guys discovering the Manosphere down a better, more positive path in life than the negative depressing spiral a lot of MRA/MGTOW types (and even some PUAs) have gone down?

            Hell, Tyler would probably be the first one to tell me “if what I say doesn’t click with you, don’t promote my shit” and be totally fine with that. Like I say, dude has come a long way in fighting his ego.


      • Red
        on July 25, 2012 at 10:17 pm
        Original Link

        I had to go grab some food at the store today & forced myself to make small talk with the cashier. It wasn’t as hard or awkward as I thought it would be, just gotta put yourself out there I guess. I still had some trouble with thinking of what to say, but yeah, baby steps. Thanks a lot for the solid advice dude.


        • YaReally
          on July 25, 2012 at 11:24 pm
          Original Link

          Good stuff dude, keep it up. Make it a habit to make small talk with people wherever you go. When you’re in the elevator with some other people, be the guy to crack a joke or mention the weather or something. When you greet people switch from saying “Hey” to “Hey, how’s it going?” Most people will just reply “Hey, fine thanks” but sometimes people will start blabbing about what’s on their mind and you find yourself in a conversation. When you’re heading somewhere, ask someone for directions on how to get there (even if you know how to get there).

          These don’t all have to be hot girls and you don’t have to bang them lol, it’s just to rack up reference experiences in your brain that “It wasn’t as hard or awkward as I thought it would be”. Once your brain has a ton of those experiences in it, it stops thinking “oh man this will be awkward” and starts thinking “this is totally normal, let’s see what this person is all about!”

          This is your new LIFE. This isn’t like, you do this for a weekend and you’re fixed. This is now who you are, you’re the guy who asks people “How’s it going?” and makes small-talk with cashiers. That’s who you are now, bam. You are not “socially awkward”, you are not “shy”, you are not an “introvert”, those are labels and identities and egos that we give ourselves to excuse ourselves from participating in life. Your ego will try to convince you to stay in your old identity, often so will your friends and family and society in general, so it’s a tough battle because often you’re the ONLY one rooting for you.

          Just remember: Who you are is what you do on a regular basis. If you talk to people on a regular basis, you are a guy who talks to people. It’s THAT simple.

          Down the road you can work on taking those things further and approaching specific types of people (aka hot girls) and trying to lead things to a specific goal and everything, but if you’re just starting out as a hardcase newbie with shyness and social anxiety, this is how you start the process of breaking out of it. Baby steps. :)

          A lot of people keep blogs/journals or just threads (or just post regularly in these comment sections) with Field Reports. A big part of doing that is that it forces your brain to register “okay, really, today WASN’T as awkward as I thought it would be” because you have to type the words out, but also it gives you something to read back over when you hit plateaus where your brain is fighting you on it…you can re-read your FRs and go “See? I did all THAT, fuck you brain, you don’t control me!”

          Your own brain/ego/identity/self-image/etc. is your toughest opponent in this whole journey:

          Good luck. You’re only 20, I WISH I had the chance you had at 20 instead of at 23, I would have had another 3 years full of life adventures under my belt. :)


        • YaReally
          on July 25, 2012 at 11:58 pm
          Original Link

          Also Tyler just posted up a good relevant video for your situation. Give this one a watch, his mentality in this is what most of us who’ve gotten good at PUA stuff have:


  • Jason
    on July 25, 2012 at 3:24 am
    Original Link

    Good comment, YaReally.

    You seem pretty deep into PUA culture. Your comment about being a hermit after college supports my anecdotal theory: that PUAs are often overcoming a sense of social inadequacy and discomfort.

    Not that I’m criticizing — more power to you — but I’m guessing that feeling socially inept for so long makes you guys try harder to understand normal social life. Which leads to a deeper understanding of game.

    From what I’ve read about Roosh, that would describe him too.


    • YaReally
      on July 25, 2012 at 11:21 am
      Original Link

      “You seem pretty deep into PUA culture.”

      Yep. I’ve been around it since before The Game was published. Changed my life dramatically. People who meet me now can’t even comprehend that I’m the same guy they knew in high school/college.

      “that PUAs are often overcoming a sense of social inadequacy and discomfort.”

      I don’t disagree with that. These days a lot more PUAs are just social guys who are looking to hone their skills or pick up some tips, because PUA is so mainstream. But you gotta’ understand, back in the day this shit was UNDERGROUND. Like, there was basically one or two places to find this info and have these discussions and that was IT. And those places weren’t advertised all over the place. There was no Mansophere or anything.

      The only way you found PUA stuff back then was by hitting such a low desperate sad rock-bottom point in your life that you’d embarrassingly type “how do I get a girlfriend?” into Google and stumble across the community. So the people we got back then were the hard cases like myself.

      I look at it like I WASTED my entire teenage/college years and part of my adulthood. While other guys were going through their first break-up in high school, I was wondering what it was like to hold a girl’s hand. While other guys were having their first kiss in high school, I was dreaming about some girl I had a crush on who had no idea I existed. While other guys were going to parties in high school and college, I was playing on the computer. While other guys were getting laid in college, I was Googling porn and jacking off. All the normal things that most people take for granted, I didn’t just miss out on, I ACTIVELY chose not to experience them by being a recluse and hiding behind labelling myself an introvert and choosing not to live life.

      So once I found the community I learned that social skills were something you could learn, not something you were born with and too-bad if you didn’t with the crap-shoot and I learned that the only reason other people were better at it than me was that they had put themselves in more social situations through their lives than I did, so I decided to start making changes, and it all snowballed from there. Since then I’ve done shit that other people will never do or would think is impossible to do and my entire outlook on life and relationships has completely changed. I’m way happier, rarely lonely, I can get laid when I want to, I have multiple social circles, I’ve lived out pretty much all the porn I used to Google (lol) etc.

      That’s why I’m passionate about 1) encouraging guys to go out and make changes in their lives, reading shit on blogs and forums isn’t going to actually do anything for you, you need field experience, and 2) PUA not being misrepresented by ignorant fucks who pigeon-hole it into whatever stereotype they want so they can talk about how evil it is or pretend to speak for PUAs when they clearly don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about. If some other guy manages to change his life the way I did, that’s fucking epic to me.



Obedience To Authority Game

Original Link

via Heartiste

blah
on July 23, 2012 at 2:53 pm
Original Link

This is like a textbook for women on what to avoid in men. I hope more women read this blog so they can recognize this stuff, and not feel like they have to put up with someone who gives them commands just to be nice or whatever.

I think women often feel like they have to obey orders and follow the herd to avoid causing trouble or being singled out and “punished” in some way. That doesn’t mean they like following the orders, just that they feel like not doing it could have more unpleasant results.

(and yeah, I’m a woman so any thoughts I have are just a “hamster” or whatever. blah blah blah)


  • Fluffy McGee
    on July 23, 2012 at 8:08 pm
    Original Link

    Yeah… shocking the puppy so she won’t upset the status quo and get in trouble… makes sense?

    I honestly laughed out loud when I read the experiement’s results.


    • Darius Jackson
      on July 23, 2012 at 8:16 pm
      Original Link

      What if it were beta males hooked up to the shocker???


      • Holden Caulfield
        on July 24, 2012 at 8:35 am
        Original Link

        The beta males are likely the 50% that obeyed.


        • Tartarus
          on July 24, 2012 at 10:00 am
          Original Link

          A cruel alpha would have obeyed too. I doubt there’s an actual correlation there.


          • YaReally
            on July 24, 2012 at 1:19 pm
            Original Link

            I think a better experiment would have been to find out a rule/principle each of the people had, something they believe strongly in and say they would never violate and then set up a situation where they’re ordered by an authority figure to break exactly that rule.

            An alpha doesn’t back down from his principles but women and betas do all the time.



Tyrone
on July 23, 2012 at 3:20 pm
Original Link

An excellent example of this is netvideogirls.com. The guy who does those porn job interview videos has tight game and gets girls from being skeptical and downright hostile to sucking his cocking with a big, greedy grin on their faces within 30 minutesl all on film and later posted to the Internet. Watch about 5-6 to see how much is a repititive routine.


  • AJ
    on July 23, 2012 at 3:36 pm
    Original Link

    If you cannot see that those things are scripted then you’re too stupid to be allowed access to a keyboard.


    • Tyrone
      on July 23, 2012 at 4:29 pm
      Original Link

      I watched several of them while bored in my hotel room in Oklahoma. None appeared scripted to me. The guy is very careful not to get charged with rape for one thing. If they were scripted, it wouldn’t be an issue at all. The same is true of Backroom Casting Couch. You must be some kind of genius to have such special powers. I bet you have two keyboards you can pound on! Wow can I be just like you day?

      Those of us who can actually accomplish such a thing don’t see it as scripted, they see it as tight game.


      • YaReally
        on July 23, 2012 at 11:23 pm
        Original Link

        Sorry dude:

        http://board.freeones.com/showthread.php?101884-Performer-Guide-Netvideogirls-com

        That doesn’t mean there aren’t game lessons to learn from certain “reality” porn though. Backroom Facials was good back in the day (the camera dude had a thick foreign angry accent, super dominant/alpha) and if I remember right some of the seducing women in the Couples Seduce Teens vids had solid game, lots of LMR-busting and 2-steps-forward-1-step-back comfort-building sexual-conversation leading etc. stuff.

        And of course every dude should watch Squirting 101 lol


        • Obstinance Works
          on July 24, 2012 at 2:52 pm
          Original Link

          Am I the only dude in the world who hates squirting? Too damn messy! Too much cleanup afterward! Yeah probably. A great disqualification or IOD though haha.


          • YaReally
            on July 24, 2012 at 7:12 pm
            Original Link

            lol normally I love it, a little mess is fine but recently I ran into a Cytheria-level squirter. It was the most insane thing I’ve ever seen, no build-up or anything required she was just a constant waterfall anytime anything got near her pussy. It was literally like her vag was dumping out 1L milk cartons of liquid over and over. I’ve seen a lot of girls squirt but this was like the kraken unleashed.

            I actually felt bad for her because she couldn’t masturbate (I tried dirty-txting her when we met and she couldn’t play along) because it would just be too messy to rub one out in her bed before sleep etc. Before we hooked up when we were talking about fantasies she wanted to do public stuff and I told her I’d take her to a crowded dance floor and get her off but holy shit everyone on the dance floor around us would slip and crack their heads open on the massive lake that would be under us.

            I couldnt imagine dating a chick like that long-term even if she was amazing as fuck outside of sex, I had to wash my sheets, pillows a ton of towels etc and my mattress was drenched all the way thru to the bottom and reaching all 4 corners so I had to sleep on the couch. It would be an LTR of nothing but sex in the shower FOREVER.

            I ended up only hooking up with her a few times and then let it go cold because I honestly just didn’t want to have to wash my sheets and piles of towels and everything so frequently lol I thought about laying down a dollar-store shower curtain but it was all just too much hassle. Never told her why I didn’t want to see her anymore, she was already pretty self conscious about her squirting but I’m sure she knew and was used to guys peacing out lol


          • YaReally
            on July 26, 2012 at 1:13 am
            Original Link

            “The woman is the container and leaker, the passive object of the sentence, the one who takes the exchange”

            lol I’d feel bad for girls who have sex with you, but I’m not sure they exist.

            Making a woman squirt is awesome. When she’s laying there completely mind-fucked and dazed, her legs jolting and shaking randomly every few minutes for an hour afterward, barely able to form words beyond “how did…what…you….omg…” and you just chuckle and pull her in to cuddle knowing you just blew her world sexually beyond what any other man has done or could do or beyond what she even thought was possible, with just a couple fingers…ahh, one of the best feelings in the world.

            Enjoy your 3 minutes of plain fully naked missionary sex in the bedroom only followed by no cuddling or enjoyment in general. I’ll be over here fuckin’ like a pornstar. :)

            Seriously guys. Squirting 101, watch it and listen to the guy teaching how to do it. Dude knows his shit and you’ll blow girls’ minds.


          • YaReally
            on July 30, 2012 at 5:11 pm
            Original Link

            “Is it possible I was not talking about the orgasm itself, but the porn industry fetish?”

            Half the time I have no idea what the fuck you’re talking about. And I often wonder if YOU do lol I didn’t bother reading past this line because I just assume it’s a bunch of your usual BS.



The Shocker
on July 23, 2012 at 3:31 pm
Original Link

Okay so yes and no.

SOME women, yes absolutely. There are some women where you can literally glide your face into hers as soon you meet her. (Fun, but not a close.)

However, a lot of women call me out on being a “you here now” caveman every time. It’s not that they aren’t compliant, or shit-testing you, they just aren’t going to let someone walk over them. They’re, you know, actual people.

This definitely correlates with attractive girls with lots of social experience.

It’s probably the #1 reason cold approach pickup attempts fail. When you walk up to a girl and drop a gimmick in your conversation, you’re asking to knock her down from her socially savvy state. Example, I’m hanging all day with a group of girls and some random guy starts chatting one up. After a few minutes, the girl turns to the group and says, “This guy says our baby’s middle name is going to be Patrick.” We laugh at him. It’s dumb. Not a fit with our state at all. He tries to laugh his way through it and I neg him with, “Love the confidence, bro.”

So yeah, rock the caveman thing. I do all the time and it’s fun. But understand what’s happening when it doesn’t work and adjust accordingly (also sense if it’s going to work or not before you try, you give up a LOT of hand if you give up aloof to be caveman).

Tyler talks about exactly this:


  • YaReally
    on July 23, 2012 at 11:14 pm
    Original Link

    I scrolled down and passed by a Tyler video and a few seconds later I was like “wait-a-sec, I haven’t posted in this article yet!” lol

    Also someone trying to caveman a girl who’s in a group that’s clearly hanging out together (you said she just turned around to the group so I’m assuming you were all standing together) isn’t exactly calibrated. Doesn’t necessarily have much to do with the girl being an “actual person”, it’s more like watching someone shit on a table in a business conference…that’s weird socially awkward behavior.

    I’m not disagreeing that there are girls that don’t respond to caveman stuff, but in the scenario you described I’d say that had more to do with the low value demo going on.



Ovid
on July 23, 2012 at 4:53 pm
Original Link

“The other day I grabbed this chicks tit walkin into a bar because she had a shirt that said “all natural jugs”. Her response?

“youre a bad ass arent you?” hahaha”

Nine, I believe your story and agree with what you have to say, but grabbing strangers’ tits is way too extreme for most of us. Too many guys could wind up in a whole lot of trouble attempting something like this.


  • YaReally
    on July 23, 2012 at 11:03 pm
    Original Link

    Cue the onslaught of uncalibrated newbies who read this stuff and think “what?? I can skip the whole “learning to be a cool guy” and “learning to socialize like a normal human being” and “learning to read other people’s emotions and feelings and calibrate to the interaction so I don’t creep everyone the fuck out” thing that takes actual work, and just run around grabbing tits?? WOOHOO!!!” and then get their faces punched in by guys at the bar, tossed out by bouncers, charged with sexual assault at the office, etc.

    That stuff is totally do-able, I do it too, but it’s not for socially awkward newbies lol


    • corvinus
      on July 24, 2012 at 12:52 am
      Original Link

      Some people gotta go through the school of hard knocks, I suppose


      • Tartarus
        on July 24, 2012 at 10:06 am
        Original Link

        I think the school of hard knocks should be avoided when those hard knocks come in the form of enormous penises of hardened inmates pounding your ass after a sexual assault conviction.


        • YaReally
          on July 24, 2012 at 1:04 pm
          Original Link

          Agreed. I’ve never been in a fight or thrown out of a bar and I’m out a LOT. But I learned the art of “not being socially retarded” before learning to be socially retarded lol

          Much as I love RSD, I hate that they churn out so many “whatever!! So what if I get punched! So what if I get arrested or she charges me with assault or I ruin her night!! You think I give a fuck you fucking phaggot??” uncalibrated newbies.

          Break society’s rules after you understand how to seduce within them. It’s a slower process but your results will be a lot more consistent and less of a Russian Roulette crapshoot numbers game where 10% of the time you succeed and 90% of the time you’re posting about how “the faggot bouncers threw me out cuz I was too badass and they’re all beta chumps”.



ATC
on July 23, 2012 at 7:36 pm
Original Link

I haven’t seen this taught in game, but a lot of naturals seem to know just how and when to get the target to sext them, presumably w/o triggering ASD. What a great compliance test – high risk, high reward.

How do they do it?


  • Obstinance Works
    on July 23, 2012 at 8:21 pm
    Original Link

    I would like to see a chateau post on “naturals.” I don’t see them as all the same. Some play more of a “high risk/reward” type of gambit, because they are more a “it’s all number’s game natural.”


    • Obstinance Works
      on July 23, 2012 at 8:24 pm
      Original Link

      Then again, there is the type of natural who knows where he is at in the situation and is not really taking much of a risk. He keeps track of the moves he is making and how the girl is responding and he already has a deep understanding of female nature even when he can’t read her response well. He can make an NBA 3-pointer turned around backwards.


      • YaReally
        on July 23, 2012 at 10:57 pm
        Original Link

        This, basically.

        They have a lot of experience with women so they have massive calibration. Like how the Dog Whisperer dude knows all sorts of shit about what a dog’s body language indicates it’s state is that anyone who hasn’t spent that much time with dog’s would be oblivious to.

        Testing the waters is usually key. You drop a tiny bit of innuendo in a conversation. If she bites on it and plays along, you can escalate it (slowly, radio knobs and all that) to sexting, if she doesn’t bite, she’s not in the mood keep the conversation normal or txt her later.

        After you’ve already fucked her it’s a lot easier, especially if you’ve set the frame that all you’re offering her in the relationship in general is sex and flirting.


        • Obstinance Works
          on July 24, 2012 at 3:07 pm
          Original Link

          A natural is usually qualifying the hell out a chick right off the bat anyway. They get chased the entire time almost. This may have nothing to do with the timing of a sext message, but they already have mega value (a lot of chips to cash in) to begin with. I think most naturals are proably very good looking to begin with. I know that isn’t the only DHV out there, but I feel that good looks may be the easiest indicator for most men, so that makes them more confident from a younger age. My looks have been on the decline in the past couple of years, because I’m a lazy fucker, so I kind of know the game from both sides of the fence.


          • YaReally
            on July 24, 2012 at 7:30 pm
            Original Link

            ya, naturals I’ve hung with screen IMMEDIATELY for whether the girl is DTF fast or not. I joke that my one buddy rates how hot a girl is based on how easy the lay will be before he bases it on her looks lol

            They’re not necessarily screening for sluttiness, more for sexual frigidity and logistics. If they run into a nice church girl who’s leaving town on a flight at 6am because she’s just up visiting her 2 cockblocky sisters he’ll walk away mid-conversation and go talk to the girl who’s local and there with a friend who’s getting laid that night. Naturals are just very efficient at knowing “this is a situation that will work out” or “this is a waste of my time” and tend to be pretty ruthless about weeding out the latter.

            Far as looks go, most naturals I know are good looking but I’d say that has more to do with the incredibly (even delusional) high opinion they have of themselves. A fat Warcraft nerd with no confidence wears shitty Wal-Mart clothes and doesn’t work out or get a decent haircut because he doesn’t value himself. Naturals at the gym are like “fuck I’m hot, look at that bicep raaaahhh” and flex in the mirror and shit lol so naturally they’re going to be in better shape, wear better clothes, etc.

            Though there’s definitely a subcategory of naturals who are just ugly-ass scumbags and still tear pussy down lol those guys are epic to watch in action.



Virgin4Life
on July 23, 2012 at 7:43 pm
Original Link

i’ve said it once, i’ll say it again.. being alpha is a function of male physical attractiveness, which is testosterone-regulated and therefore genetically pre-determined. if you’re ugly and/or have no money in the bank, you aren’t going to be telling any woman anything, i don’t care how good your social skills are.

alphas are born, not made. only a moron would think otherwise.


  • YaReally
    on July 23, 2012 at 10:51 pm
    Original Link

    Strong username to post content correlation.



jamezhi
on July 23, 2012 at 10:13 pm
Original Link

If u know a girl is outside your leagues would you game or give in? And beta up! .. When is d number of days to give up if she is given in …. am on a trip with dis Girl i have know for 3 yrs.. I have to smaSh her


  • YaReally
    on July 23, 2012 at 11:25 pm
    Original Link

    From the way you type it sounds like every girl is out of your league. wtf are you asking dude.



Trimegistus
on July 24, 2012 at 10:35 am
Original Link

I witnessed a great example of herd behavior in women back in college. We still had women’s and men’s dorms then, though ours were two halves of a single building. The dorms had a “house council” which allocated the little allowance of money from the college housing office.

My men’s dorm council meetings were like steel-cage wrestling matches. Insults, catcalls, intense debate, grudges, arguments, deal-making — all the classic elements of politics turned up to 11. It took about two hours to get through a weekly meeting, even if there was nothing on the agenda.

The women’s dorm council meetings took about fifteen minutes because all the issues were decided in advance. The voting was just a formality, and the actual decisionmaking took place over the course of the week in informal discussions that ironed out any disagreement.

In short, the men had loud dick-length contests every week, while the women had a tranquil hive-mind.


  • YaReally
    on July 24, 2012 at 1:16 pm
    Original Link

    lol I like this example.



Porn Is A Portent Of Sexbotopia

Original Link

via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 18, 2012 at 6:43 pm
Original Link

“Answer: 50 Shades of Gray, tabloids, Facebook, OkCupid, pulp romance novels, pretty much everything on TV, high glycemic carbs.”

Fucking lol’ed at this (not untrue) punch line after the big build-up to the question.

When I first met my natural buddy he told me he doesn’t look at porn or jack off. I thought he was joking around till I hung with him for a while…dude gets new girls weekly and has around 10 in rotation. He doesn’t bother with porn and hasn’t for years because he always has girls available. If he needs to bust a nut he txts till one of his girls comes over or hits the bar for new girls. He can’t even comprehend needing a porn stash lol



Value Added

Original Link

via Rational Male

YaReally
on July 16th, 2012 at 7:59 pm
Original Link

Fucking epic dodge! Congrats.


Tosh’s Mosh Pit

Original Link

via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 16, 2012 at 2:50 pm
Original Link

Apologizing is admitting that there is even the remote possibility that what you did was in some way wrong. Strongest frame always wins. “These are not the droids you’re looking for” shit.

I say horrible offensive things to people I’ve just met all the time…there’s a split second where they have a look of horror on their face because they logically know they should be offended but their frame is weak like most of society (since a strong frame makes you an “asshole”) so despite their slack-jawed gasp of disbelief I can see in their eyes that they’re looking at me to determine if they should follow it up with a raging rant or laughter.

The best comedians have epic frame control.


  • YaReally
    on July 16, 2012 at 3:04 pm
    Original Link

    (they don’t KNOW they’re pinging off their environment for how to react/think btw, it’s subconscious shit and they will backwards-rationalize how they obviously chose their reaction themselves and that their reaction makes perfect sense despite any blaring incongruencies and was completely of their own accord. The same way we think advertising doesn’t influence our choices as we gulp down a Pepsi and some McDonald’s and watch the latest summer blockbuster after listening to a top 40 song…this is like a glitch in the Matrix you can play with for “good” or “evil” depending on your intentions. I’ve used it for both lol)



Denial

Original Link

via Rational Male

YaReally
on July 13th, 2012 at 5:51 pm
Original Link

Perfectly put.


Is Seduction Real?

Original Link

via Rational Male

YaReally
on July 14th, 2012 at 1:23 pm
Original Link

1) The PUA community used to focus a lot on trying to figure out how to turn around any situation no matter how impossible it seemed. Whether it was a cold initial reception, active hatred by the girl, a flakey number, a girl who landed a BF, married women etc etc. This benefitted the knowledge-base a LOT. It’s because of trying to plow through or smoothly recover from these situations that we broke through a lot of limiting beliefs society has about attraction. We know now that a girl rejecting you can simply be a shit-test she secretly hopes you pass, married/taken girls can be seduced easily, flakes can be turned around, you can sleep with friends/sisters of girls you’ve already hooked up with, insta-dates leading to sex are possible, daytime seduction/sex is possible, etc etc.

These days, especially in the manosphere/MRA mentality but also in a lot of the PUA community, there’s a very strong notion of “if she doesn’t get on board…NEXT!!!” and we cut our losses fast and move on and don’t waste your time and play more of a numbers game. The old mentality was basically “you can’t Next a girl you haven’t slept with, that’s her Next’ing YOU.”

While the knowledge we gained from pushing these impossible situations was amazing, and you really COULD pretty consistently turn a lot of situs around, ultimately it meant that a lot of guys were investing a lot of time and energy into seducing girls they didn’t really have much chemistry with. It was more for the notch on the belt, the thrill of the hunt, the joy of solving a puzzle and sharing the solution with other PUAs on this new frontier.

Now while today’s attitude isn’t as good for breaking new ground, it results in a lot healthier and more natural relationships where guys find girls they actually click with and have chemistry with earlier on. I think that’s a good thing in the long run because most guys aren’t looking to master the seduction skillset for any type of woman, they’re looking for a quality girlfriend or a small harem of cool chicks they enjoy having in their life…especially in the manosphere (PUA schools tend to still be more focused on racking up lays in general).

That said, while I’m glad the mental shift has been made to generally healthier relationships, back in the day there was a very real and pretty justified belief that a good PUA could seduce pretty much any woman if he had the chance to work his game on her. The old “5 for 5″ thing wasn’t totally a joke. Our conversion rates back then were a lot higher than guys these days. Our game was a lot more flexible too, we could completely change personalities and tactics based on the type of girl we were dealing with…vs today where we focus more on “be yourself and self-amuse and find girls who like who you really are” which again is more healthy in the longrun.

2) I’ve slept with a number of women for whom I’m not their type at ALL. Like girls who’s dating history is the complete opposite of me and who find themselves actually frustratingly puzzled at why they wanted to sleep with me. Girls that if I wasn’t running game and was just standing in the room, would never have taken a 2nd glance at me. Whether its height, status, money, race, fashion style, etc. I’ve been just completely not what they’re normally attracted to. Hell some of them were hate fucks because they hated that they were attracted to me, and some wouldn’t even admit we knew eachother in public because I didn’t fit in their social circle or in their friend’s judgement of the type of guy she’d be with lol

Again none of that is super healthy in terms of forging a relationship (tho it can be done, it’s just a lot more effort). But in answering the question of whether a girl who’s cold or uninterested or actively dislikes you can be seduced, I would say yes. The more important question is simply: is it worth the effort? What “prize” do you really get out of it? Why is it important to you to get this specific girl’s validation? etc.


What Do You Do If A Girl Calls Your Disqualification Bluff?

Original Link

via Heartiste

Lumpy
on July 12, 2012 at 4:54 pm
Original Link

Love this and the recent Juggler post. I’m here to get laid, not circle jerk about the pills I swallow and what color they are.


  • King A (Matthew King)
    on July 12, 2012 at 6:15 pm
    Original Link

    You’re “here” at a website “to get laid.” Problem number one. You think you mask the stink of beta ambition/desperation with Axe body spray? But leave that aside. Reconsider what motivates you in differing situations, and make your motivations congruent to the opportunity in front of you.

    Another commenter: “You think too much.”

    Just so it’s clear. You can’t get laid at a website. No matter what eHarmony claims in its ads. You can only exchange thoughts here. It is an environment designed for “much” “think[ing].”

    You cannot hump your computer screen (comfortably). But you can communicate the words that design the circumstances where you can more easily “get laid.” In real vaginas. Part of that requires the patience to return to fundamentals. And fundamentals are not always directly applicable to techniques you can use tonight.

    The world is not tailor-constructed around the needs of princesses like you and The Boy Who Thinks Too Little. Take what specifics are useful to your circumstances. Be man enough to discard or ignore the rest, rather than bitching and sighing about how awful it is to navigate past conversations that have no apparent utility for you.

    Women are not much in evidence on this forum, but that’s not because they are intimidated from participating. Rather, they find the discussions of science distasteful, boring, repetitious, and/or superfluous. They like the sausage (heh), but they don’t like to see how it’s made. This website is where the alpha sausage is made. It is a butchershop reeking of blood and ground flesh, where omega scraps are shaped into tasty, glorious wieners. Stay away if the acrid stench of dying things gives you the vapors.

    Have you ever heard women complain about nothing just to sate an urge to re-validate a perpetual right to complain? That’s you.

    Matt


    • YaReally
      on July 12, 2012 at 7:48 pm
      Original Link

      Have you ever heard women complain about nothing just to sate an urge to re-validate a perpetual right to complain? That’s you.

      :*


      • King A (Matthew King)
        on July 13, 2012 at 12:50 pm
        Original Link

        Okay. You’ve gone from obscure acronyms to inscrutable emoticons. What is :* ? Anusface?


        • YaReally
          on July 13, 2012 at 5:30 pm
          Original Link

          It makes a kissy-face on Blackberries and some IM programs. I learned it from girls. I guess it makes sense that you wouldn’t recognize it since you’d have to interact with women to run into it.

          Now, however, I will refer to it as an anus-face lol :* :*


          • YaReally
            on July 14, 2012 at 8:26 pm
            Original Link

            aww c’mon don’t be an anus-face.


    • Tertullian
      on July 12, 2012 at 7:53 pm
      Original Link

      God is a superstition, and King A (Matthew King) is a false prophet.

      For fuck’s sake, King A. Must you ALWAYS respond to a reader’s post with some smug, arrogant, condescending drivel? Remember: what with your belief in a supernatural being who created mankind, you are fundamentally no different than the most ignorant, superstitious jungle savage who bows down to handmade idols and implores them to stop, or start, the rain.

      That inescapable fact makes your arrogance, not to say your nauseatingly flaccid prose, a bit much to take.

      Despite what you may think, you are not “Diogenes with his lamp,” doggedly pointing out the proper moral path to legions of misguided wanna-be PUA’s. Instead, you are the equivalent of a wild-eyed, long-haired subway masturbator wearing a placard which says “Repent now, sinners: the end is near.”

      GBFM’s seemingly mindless comments always make perfect sense, and illustrate his point with wit and humor. Your comments, on the other hand, are the intellectual equivalent of a Happy Meal from McDonalds: superficially tasty, but actually completely valueless.

      Please avoid commenting on matters above your intellectual pay grade, Matt.


      • immoralgables
        on July 12, 2012 at 8:21 pm
        Original Link

        I hear what you’re saying Tertullian. I actually appreciate King A putting down dickriding hater Sam Vincente so go easy on him. I actully enjoyed King As post.

        King A, I do have a grievance. Although your verbose comments do make a good read, you do little in the way of offering actual advice or solutions.

        For example, a couple posts ago here on CH, you and YaReally got into it and went back and forth yet in the end I was exhausted reading your shit. YaReally provides good solid insight and advice on pickup.

        Don’t get me wrong, I think you are above the cut but please add value in the sense that for us aspiring to exit the realm of beta, simply reminding us of our rank and cutting us at the knees is not productive.

        Give some practical advice as YaReally does or GTFO really. That’s why I think YaReally is superb with his comments, his input is a way to work our way out of our current predicament while you use big words to point and laugh.

        I’m not trying to come at you dude but if you know so goddamn much why don’t you point us in a positive direction and try to make a change.

        -I.G.


        • Marellus
          on July 13, 2012 at 4:31 am
          Original Link

          You’re all posturing too. What makes KingA unique is that the women love interacting with him online. His whole style of writing is a DHV. And the women cannot get enough of it.

          And whatever else is being said, it’s harder to impress a woman online than in real life … especially when there was no face-to-face contact beforehand.

          So the question is this : If you’re good with women online, does that make you good with women in real life ?

          Yes.

          Still disagree with me ? Ask Maya then.

          For the converse is not necessarily true. You can be good with women in real life, but be atrocious with them online. Hence many PUA’s denigration of online game.

          One ability does not guarantee the other in this case.

          The only way that any of you will beat KingA, here and now, is by being poetic.

          Otherwise start reading Seneca.


          • YaReally
            on July 13, 2012 at 5:40 pm
            Original Link

            “Ask Maya then.”

            Still pretty sure Maya is a dude lol

            “You can be good with women in real life, but be atrocious with them online. Hence many PUA’s denigration of online game.”

            lol wow no, online is easy as shit. We tend to hate it though because it’s passive/slow and more of a numbers game and the quality of women is usually pretty awful. The turbo hottie that intimidates other men isn’t on a dating site (if she is, she’s getting 500 emails a day or she’s a prostitute rounding up clients or is actually a dude luring guys to porn sites). Now if you want chubby single moms with depression who spout that annoying “if you can’t handle me at my worst” quote, online is a smorgasbord.

            I keep a POF account going in the background for dry spells but it’s a last ditch desperation fallback move because eww lol



YaReally
on July 12, 2012 at 6:22 pm
Original Link

Just a note on Mystery VS Tyler and DQ timing differences. Mystery’s style tends to involve an entourage and generally standing out a ton from the start, whereas Tyler tends to just be him and a wing like any other dude the girl has seen.

Mystery’s giving off high value signals early on (peacocking showing he can handle social pressure, entourage of friends and pivots (female friends/wingmen) showing he has social proof, doing his magic tricks as DHVs etc) so it makes sense for him to DQ himself ASAP.

Tyler’s high value doesn’t come through as immediately because he’s pretty average at first glance and isn’t surrounded by people and PUAs strategically giving him props. Tyler’s value comes through over the course of the interaction as the girl shit-tests him and his frame and he demonstrates his value repeatedly. So for his style it makes sense to DQ later once the girl has seen his high value and is hooked.

Basically this boils down to the consistent principle of “you can’t disqualify yourself and have a girl chase you if you’re not high value to her.”

(there are nuances and exceptions to this but this is the jist for newbies to keep in mind)



Dr. Jeremy
on July 13, 2012 at 2:30 am
Original Link

All disqualifications are not created equal. They are operating on subtle, but different, psychological principles…

Preemptive Self and Target types of disqualifications (#1 and #2) are most often working on the principle of Reactance (i.e. reverse psychology). Basically, this is the idea that people “react” by wanting something they are told they can’t have. Therefore, these disqualifications increase perceived value or desire for what is being denied. In PUA terms, they primarily increase attraction.

In contrast, Handicapping and Beta Bait types of disqualifications (#3 and #4) are most often working on the principles of Liking and Credibility. People tend to like and trust others more when they are a bit human, fallible, and imperfect. It makes them feel more approachable and easier to relate to. Also, being a bit modest and non-reactive makes someone seem more credible (and motivates others to let their guards down). Therefore, these disqualifications make someone more likable and trustworthy. In PUA terms, they primarily increase comfort.

Overall, that is why different PUAs use what seems like the same qualification technique at different times. Mystery, for example, is using type 1 and 2 techniques early on to build attraction and pump arousal. Juggler, in contrast, is using type 3 and 4 techniques a bit later in an interaction to create comfort and build trust. Therefore, correct use of disqualification in the moment requires knowing what emotion you need to build – attraction or comfort – and picking the right type of disqualification technique to trigger it.


  • YaReally
    on July 13, 2012 at 4:23 pm
    Original Link

    Good breakdown!



dickmojo
on July 13, 2012 at 8:16 am
Original Link

I got a question~ how can you respond to a girl who tells you: “you try too hard”?
Is that just an instant cut-your-losses scenario, or is it salvageable?


  • YaReally
    on July 13, 2012 at 4:43 pm
    Original Link

    Generally “you try too hard” isn’t a shit-test, usually it’s a girl’s way of saying “I think you’re cute and WANT to like you more but you’re turning me off with what you’re doing right now.”

    There’s actually a deep/advanced principle in pickup where occasionally girls will basically tell you how to seduce them and you learn when that’s a test and when it’s as simple as agreeing with them and following the blueprint they laid out.

    Tyler demonstrates this with the red-headed rocker chick at 1:02:

    Where he’s like “I’m a nice guy” and she tells him no he’s not he’s secretly a bad guy. He can tell this is her saying “i like bad guys and i like you so I hope you’re a bad guy” so instead of clinging to the nice guy thing he switches gears and goes “okay I’m a bad guy”. She’s telling him how to seduce her.

    So the try-hard bit is her doing the same thing, telling you how to seduce her (tone it down). So agree with her and drop in some vulnerability. If you throw a zingy witty cocky/funny response it just feeds into the try-hard label she assigned you.

    Something said super sincere like “I know, sorry, you make me nervous, I don’t meet many girls who (something awesome about her)” or “Ya I know, my bad, I’m just saying stupid shit right now because my brain stops working when you look me in the eyes like that.” as you grin and stare into her eyes.

    Usually this’ll save it and make her go “awww” and give you another chance, and at this point you drop any cocky/funny or teasing entirely an just focus on building comfort/rapport like a normal chill dude. Down the road you can sprinkle in some teasing and stuff but she needs you to “be real” for a bit.



mangos
on July 13, 2012 at 9:52 am
Original Link

Women don’t mock men for trying to date us properly. We mock them for lying to us in order to (probably) sleep with us for one night while acting like you really like us. It’s like a thief getting caught on his way out of the store. Of course he’ll be the laughing stock of the witnesses for the next few days! He tried to break the rules. Why should we reward this?


  • Anonymous
    on July 13, 2012 at 9:58 am
    Original Link

    Keep reading and stfu.
    You’re obviously new around here and you don’t know what you’re talking about.


    • King A (Matthew King)
      on July 13, 2012 at 2:08 pm
      Original Link

      Stop chasing the chicks away with your He-Man Girl Haters Club. Their delusions are valuable reminders of how they think in their front-brain. We reap our dividends elsewhere.

      “He tried to break the rules. Why should we reward this?”! Perfection.

      Her hamster will be driving her to ask this in a hypnotic mantra all the way to her infiltration. Talk about a “thief.” He tried to break me. Why am I rewarding this? He is breaking me. Why did I reward this? Petite mort. Exeunt. Next day: He broke me. Why do I want to reward him?

      Matt


      • mangos
        on July 13, 2012 at 2:17 pm
        Original Link

        You know, some of us do have ethics and self-control. I fell in love with an alpha once. I will tolerate some level of game (it’s understandable that you want to appear attractive to women) but I cut him off when he started lying to me by omission (hint: gaming girls in your social circle can backfire when she has spies looking out for her). I had an opportunity to have sex with him and I was too disgusted with his duplicitous behavior (which of course was designed to make me feel more attracted) so I declined.

        If he was nice, he could have had me. Of course I still find him very attractive physically, but like I said, some of us have self-control.


        • YaReally
          on July 13, 2012 at 4:56 pm
          Original Link

          I can’t remember if theres a term for the threat girls use when arguing against game where an individual girl will speak for “the group” and basically threaten to cut a man off from sex.

          Like if you dare do something “we” don’t like, no girl will ever have sex with you again. It’s not “shaming”, but it’s along those lines where it’s like “get in line with what I say or we’ll all cut you off from pussy”

          Aunt Sue did this one a TON to me when we went back and forth a while back lol I didn’t call her out on it cause I was trying not to get banned too fast but there really should be a term for this technique if there isn’t one.

          This chick’s post is a good example of both that tactic and the “girls just KNOW” vagina omnipotence where girls threaten that no one can trick or deceive them. It’s impossible, they have spies everywhere and they know how to play the game etc etc etc.

          Both are bullshit threats that guys should laugh off. :)


  • Anonymous
    on July 13, 2012 at 10:04 am
    Original Link

    Who’s rules?


    • mangos
      on July 13, 2012 at 12:48 pm
      Original Link

      Rules of society: don’t lie, don’t cheat, don’t steal, treat others how you want to be treated

      Aren’t men supposed to be more moral than women?


      • itsme
        on July 13, 2012 at 1:21 pm
        Original Link

        treat others how you want to be treated

        +1.

        this is exactly why i treat girls like sex objects.


        • YaReally
          on July 13, 2012 at 4:57 pm
          Original Link

          lol’ed! Stealing that



Eric Hale
on July 13, 2012 at 11:30 am
Original Link

So…being handsome and well-built, should I avoid the DQ’s except with 8-10 territory hotties?

I feel like I’ve missed a couple of 7-8s by being too quick to assume that they were about to throw a DQ on me. Maybe I crossed a line and made them feel inadequate. Thoughts?


  • YaReally
    on July 13, 2012 at 5:09 pm
    Original Link

    Your looks automatically DQ you with 7s-8s because they assume they couldn’t REALLY have you.

    So DQ’ing on top of that is overkill. They’re dying for you to DQ yourself so they can say “it’s not that I don’t deserve him it’s that he’s not looking for a GF right now” or whatever your DQ was, to protect their ego. Sometimes they’ll be complete bitchy assholes to you even lol since they’re thinking “he’s obviously about to DQ me because he’s so good looking he couldnt possibly want me, so I’ll DQ him first harshly so I can tell people I’m the one who rejected him!” and then that’s how you have the fat girl saying you just want to use her for sex and she’s not that kind of girl, or the plain Jane girl saying she doesn’t like when guys are too muscular etc.

    9s-10s expect to get a guy like you and are used to getting what they want in general, so you need a DQ because your looks aren’t a DQ by default like with the 7s-8s.



Wayne Elise, Pacing, And Conversational Context

Original Link

via Heartiste

Brian
on July 9, 2012 at 2:53 pm
Original Link

I don’t understand why so many people can’t grasp the use of the “neg”. I don’t know if I got this solely from your site, or a mixture of you, Roosh, and Rolo, but it’s become pretty obvious to me that the neg isn’t about finding some way to make a dig at her; it’s about making it clear that you don’t take her that seriously without being so blatant that you piss her off.

As you’ve said on here before: tease, tease, tease. Even in a serious relationship, playfully teasing keeps her interest better than anything else. Granted, if you’re dating European women, you have to rein that in more than usual.


  • YaReally
    on July 9, 2012 at 5:09 pm
    Original Link

    “I don’t understand why so many people can’t grasp the use of the “neg”.”

    Because they don’t go out and try it and learn the calibration needed to understand “ohhh if I say it this way with this bull-in-a-china-shop timing I’m a socially awkward retard who pisses girls off but if I say it this other way with this other timing they drop their panties”.

    Keyboard jockies spouting their “theories” with no (or limited) field experience. Whether they’re shitty PUAs, keyboard jockies on manosphere comment sections, or feminists or average Aunt Sue type women who spout nonsense like “if my husband ever DARED tease me I’d divorce him instantly!!!!!!!” completely oblivious to how much their hubby actually does it.


    • Obstinance Works
      on July 9, 2012 at 7:56 pm
      Original Link

      If you are so smart, then give examples of everything you mentioned. We need specifics kid.


      • YaReally
        on July 9, 2012 at 8:36 pm
        Original Link

        Sure. What specifically do you want examples of? Happy to clarify anything I talk about.


        • Obstinance Works
          on July 9, 2012 at 8:44 pm
          Original Link

          Calibration, timing, shitty PUAs are good for now. Also you said once that you never call a girl, just test. I can see this maybe, but why is this? Just being laconic or why don’t you ever let her hear your voice over the phone?


          • YaReally
            on July 10, 2012 at 6:48 pm
            Original Link

            Calibration:
            - understanding that how the girl perceives herself on the 1-10 scale isn’t always the same as how you or everyone else perceives her

            - understanding how she believes you’ll perceive her on the 1-10 scale based on her life experience

            - reading whether she had a playful teasing personality or one that won’t receive negs well

            - reading whether you went too far with a neg or not far enough and pulling back to smooth it over or escalating further with another neg or callback humor

            - understanding what sort of neg will apply to what sort of personality type (can’t neg a girl’s looks if she doesn’t value her looks, maybe the neg should be about her social status or intelligence etc)

            - the environment you’re in and the company in her group

            etc etc etc. lots of little nuances you learn in the field. You can’t just READ about this shit.

            Timing:
            - how invested is she in you?

            - what is your value to her at any given time in the interaction? Low value + neg = lol fuck off loser, high value + neg = omg I want him to like me

            - what stage of the seduction are you in? Opener? Flirting? Rapport/comfort? End-game? Should you neg her when she’s opening up to you the way you’d neg her on approach? Is she so full of herself that you need to neg her all the way to the bedroom? Does she like you so fast that a neg will destroy her and fuck up the pickup?

            Shitty PUAs:
            - guys who don’t have enough field practice and fuck up all the stuff I described above lol sure an analytical person like myself could break down like 90% of all likely situations and calibrations for those situations…but it’d be thousands of pages of writing that even if you read it it wouldnt be internalize, and instead you could learn it in a few months by just going out 4+ times a week and trying it out.

            Phone stuff below.


          • YaReally
            on July 10, 2012 at 7:04 pm
            Original Link

            (essentially I can tell you how to throw a hook punch. And you can read pages and pages of when the best opening for a hook punch is. You can even watch videos of boxing matches and pay attention to when they throw hooks.

            But if you haven’t stepped into the ring and thrown hundreds or thousands of hooks and noted when they work and don’t work and when they need modifications and what types of opponents will fall for them and how people react when you land them or how to recover when you miss them, you will get raped in your first fight. Especially when your “opponent” (ie – the hot girl) has thousands of hours in the ring already (girls learn calibration and basic gsme shit as soon as they grow tits just to survive the barrage of male/female good/bad attention they get daily).

            The only way to gain that skill and instinct and natural flow of “this is the time to throw a hook in this particular way at this particular spot” is to get in the fucking ring and take some bruises lol)


          • YaReally
            on July 10, 2012 at 7:24 pm
            Original Link

            I just don’t like talking on the phone lol I grew up with IRC and ICQ and MSN and shit so txting is more natural to me. And people on the phone are boring and like, chew food or there’s long silences or “what? What was that?” etc. I’m just not a fan.

            My txting is pretty verbose. I send longer txts than the community advises (“bring da movies”) but I know what I’m doing so its fine. I’m essentially running the same verbal game I run in person but via txt so it’s a little slower paced but the teases and everything are the same style.

            I txt during the day because I know girl’s can’t talk on the phone at work and they’re usually bored shitless at work. So if I meet a girl Saturday and grab her # cause she works early in the morning, the next day I’ll txt her about how nice it is to sleep in while I know she’s at work and it starts a teasing vibe right there. Throughout her day we’ll txt, it’ll come in spurts as she gets a little 5 minute txting window here and there depending on her job and how busy she is. Some girl’s we’ll chat all day…so I’ve put in 8 hours of txting technically but we really only shot txts back and forth every hour or two. This builds comfort though so when I push for hanging out that night or after work tomorrow or whatever 1) she’s comfortable with me and 2) she’s used to me txting so it’s not weird for me to arrange a meet-up via txt.

            I’ll also txt late at night (10pm+) where she’s probably in bed chilling and winding down and not in a phone convo mood.

            I escalate via txt too if the vibe is there. I use txting to practice turning conversations sexual. You get time to think up a good response and figure out how to make whatever she said lead into innuendo and sexy flirting. This translates to real life with other girls where I’ve led so many convos to sex that it flows naturally now.

            If the signals are there I’ll escalate to turning her on or making her get herself off via txt too. Girls love the written word that’s why romance novels sell. They can get horny off a good description or just the right extremely direct phrase at the right time. And if her environment logistics allow it (night time txts she’s alone in her bed half naked, some girls jobs don’t watch them or they have a bathroom they can sneak off to etc) I’ll make her play with herself and usually try to make them send pics/vids as they do lol this is best with fuckbuddies you’ve already hooked up with but I do it with girls I haven’t banged yet too so that’s not a requirement. It just comes down to reading her emotional state in her txts and smoothly escalating when the logistics are solid enough.

            Every chick has a few swimsuit, naked titty, “playing with my pussy”, lingerie, etc pics of herself handy. You just want to get SOMETHING where she’s trusting you with this personal pic/vid and from there it usually snowballs because they get into the exhibitionism of it.

            For the record I pretty much never send pics of myself either lol I will if it’s a fuckbuddy and we’re just horny and I’m building up to later that night/week when we can meet up and finally fuck (tons of sexual tension built up by then) but new girls it’s a one-way street. I don’t send pics of my wang to randoms lol


    • Tjackson
      on July 9, 2012 at 8:01 pm
      Original Link

      Damn, Yareally. I thought you were coming around to starting a blog. Whats the plan?


      • Anon
        on July 9, 2012 at 8:37 pm
        Original Link

        he already said it’s not gonna happen.
        he wanted to gather all his posts on the manosphere, but got lazy.


        • YaReally
          on July 10, 2012 at 5:29 pm
          Original Link

          even worse I’m too lazy to bother logging into the WordPress account I made lol my phone auto-fills me in as yareally instead of my yareallypua one with the boobie avatar so it’s like fuck it this is good enough.

          Experiment FAIL!!


    • Matthew King
      on July 10, 2012 at 1:41 pm
      Original Link

      YaReally wrote:

      Because they don’t go out and try it and learn the calibration needed … Keyboard jockies spouting their “theories” with no (or limited) field experience.

      Hey, if all I had was “field experience,” I’d think it was the ne plus ultra of pick-up too. And I’d also think that everyone who disagreed were by definition “keyboard jockeys” spouting inert “‘”‘”theories.”‘”‘” Nowhere in your imagination is there room for people like Heartiste himself, who not only has the experience but also the mental acumen to develop theory around that experience.

      Some of us understand the power of the neg because we have seen it work and because we understand (and can articulate) why it works. Just because you can’t explain the source of your tricks’ power doesn’t prove that those who can lack time “in the field.” The two sources of knowledge are not related. In the best people they are unified, the wisdom of the street combined with the power of the tower.

      So the best you can come up with — just like all of your other futile attempts to go deep — is that people don’t believe in the neg because they haven’t come to Revelation by your path, which is, by witnessing it at work. That is not the case at all. Your typical feminized man does not believe in the neg because he has been taught from the cradle that all “negative” comments against princesses is socially gauche, and he lacks the courage to break the moratorium himself. Even the few naturals who discovered the neg before St. Mystery Taught Us All face the pressure of going against massive convention alone. Despite witnessing it working, they feel mother-instilled guilt at being “manipulative” or “sociopathic” or just plain rude. You say, Don’t feel guilty, because it works. We (including CH) say, Here’s why you never should have felt guilty at all, independent of its utility in the field.

      That guilt is what underground forums like this site attack, because here we meet many men who attest that negs work and are nothing to feel guilty about. It is not an exclusively by-the-numbers forum on how to get laid. This forum attracts people beyond your expertise because CH has the ability to apply wisdom in the game to the broader culture. As his most recent tweet indicates:

      Deficit spending+equalist zeal+Danegeld+feminism+open borders+social safety net morality = perfect storm of American decline.

      . But what does that have to do with pick-up!

      It has plenty to do with pick-up because CH naturally, almost accidentally, extends his mastery beyond the area that taught him wisdom (game) to other realms of knowledge.

      So you talk exclusively to men who want to know what works; the rest of us talk to them, too, but we also allow for their liberation from a greater influence they weren’t aware was binding them. And that influence is applicable to much more than pick-up, despite the fact that our discussion of its broad application confuses and frustrates and irritates you. It’s not your expertise, fine. But your petty barbs about “keyboard jockeying” speak more about your limitations than ours.

      Matt


      • YaReally
        on July 10, 2012 at 5:27 pm
        Original Link

        lol

        “Nowhere in your imagination is there room for people like Heartiste himself”

        What? I like Heartiste, dipshit. I’ve said numerous times that the chateau spouts good stuff that’s congruent with PUA teachings and when it does stray its generally from a lack of understanding (such as the Horse Girl opener that brought me here).

        Or is this where you make it sound like I’m saying ridiculous easy-to-argue-with shit I didn’t actually say so you can argue with yourself for 10 paragraphs again?

        “Just because you can’t explain the source of your tricks’ power doesn’t prove that those who can lack time “in the field.””

        lol oh, I guess it is where you make shit up to argue with yourself after all. Good to see you’re keeping true to form!

        Just like most pickup concepts I can explain the FUCK out of the neg lol from a combination of the guy who invented it’s teaching, the thousands of guys who tested it out over the last 10 years’ testing/revising, and my own extensive in-field experience with it.

        If you’re going to just make shit up at least make it something that makes sense. Anyone who’s read any of my posts knows I can explain the shit out of concepts, there’s no “mysterious magic power”.

        You write so well, it’s just a shame you write such useless unhelpful bullshit lol


        • King A (Matthew King)
          on July 10, 2012 at 9:07 pm
          Original Link

          Of course you like Heartiste. That’s why you and I contribute here. You just can’t fathom how his posts on pick-up are related to, say, the “perfect storm of American decline.” And so you assume that those of us who are conversant in broader topics can’t be conversant in the narrow specialty that interests you. If it doesn’t relate to pick-up, it doesn’t relate to you. But it doesn’t appear to relate only because you either refuse or are too dull to make the connection, even when it is laid out for you in “10 paragraphs.”

          Of course you can explain a neg. You can probably explain how it works, too. But you can’t explain why it works. Which is fine, for the most part. Where you go off the rails is thinking that our ability to explain why it works is some indication of our reliance on unapplied theory over experience.

          My focus is broad. Yours is narrow — and good on you for that. That kind of minute scrutiny is important to tease out the implications of details, a necessary curiosity that I don’t share. Your constant impulse to confront me is silly and short-sighted. I am not encroaching on your little bailiwick. “The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing.” Both areas of concentration have their uses.

          Matt


          • YaReally
            on July 11, 2012 at 6:51 pm
            Original Link

            “You just can’t fathom how his posts on pick-up are related to, say, the “perfect storm of American decline.””

            What you don’t get is that I fully understand it. I just don’t give a shit. If it helps you sleep at night to sit on a high horse pretending you’re a better person for caring about all of mankind, go nuts. And let us know when you change the world, I’m sure you’re right on the verge of it.

            “Of course you can explain a neg. You can probably explain how it works, too. But you can’t explain why it works.”

            lol saying it over and over doesn’t make it true. I understand the big picture very thoroughly, it’s just that your well-being is not a concern to me. I don’t go around handing out thousands of dollars to the homeless alcoholic bum on the street either. He can fix himself if he wants to.


    • John Dark
      on July 10, 2012 at 3:52 pm
      Original Link

      As a reforming AFC (older guy) who has benefitted from YaReally’s advice in the past, I will say that calibrating negs is hard. At this point negs are difficult for me, (still got a lot of that “gentleman” indoctrination in me).

      Negged a woman I was interested in but it was too soft, did not make much impact. Next time we met, both my timing was off and i negged too hard. She was a little pissed off. My conclusion is that I need more practice.


      • YaReally
        on July 10, 2012 at 8:42 pm
        Original Link

        “My conclusion is that I need more practice.”

        You’ll get the hang of it eventually. I don’t remember my first neg but it was pretty weak I’m sure. Now there are times where I’ll do stuff that would just mortify most people lol stuff that goes way past negging and would be considered straight up abuse *IF* I wasn’t highly calibrated enough that I can tell when a girl knows that we’re playing a game. This results in a lot of white knightery from the sidelines where a guy is like “hey you can’t do that!!” and wants to kick my ass but then the girl grabs me and says “noooo I like him” and we run off leaving the WK behind confused as fuck because he can’t comprehend what just happened because he has no social calibration.


  • Joe Eoj
    on July 10, 2012 at 11:16 am
    Original Link

    “Many people” can’t grasp it because many people are socially incompetent retards with no understanding of social dynamics. And many of these social retards are precisely the people who wind up reading PUA literature. Combine this with, perhaps, some badly-written PUA literature and you’ve got yourself a situation where there’s a legion of men wandering around thinking that the way to get women to drop their panties is by walking up saying “y’know, for a fat girl, you’ve got pretty small tits”.

    The neg is an advanced-level tool which should never have been placed into the hands of beginners. It’s like handing sixteen-year-olds the keys to Formula 1 cars and expecting them to teach themselves how to drive; they’re going to crash, and then they’re going to burn to death while they try to figure out how to undo their harnesses.

    Negging isn’t even a tool as such, in my opinion. It’s just something that comes out of your mouth naturally, when you have the correct attitude.


    • YaReally
      on July 10, 2012 at 5:33 pm
      Original Link

      “The neg is an advanced-level tool which should never have been placed into the hands of beginners.”

      Yup. Mystery wasn’t writing his original shit for the keyboard jockies or for mainstream fame. He was writing his shit for guys who went out 4+ times a week actually training their skills. Guys who were advanced and could wield it properly. Not the idiot who goes “maxim says the neg is teh ultimate weponz!!! Imma use it hey girl you are ugly as shit let’s bang!!”



YaReally
on July 9, 2012 at 5:23 pm
Original Link

Juggler’s legit. His stuff tends to be the opposite of the “college bro” style of game. Great for daygame and older men and just generally mixing into the “college bro” style around the comfort/rapport/qualifying stage.

This is why when idiots who’ve just glanced at PUA shit try to imply I’m some 20yo Jersey Shore wannabe to discredit me it just tells me they only have a surface level understanding of actual PUA game. The Jersey Shore cocky-funny shit alone won’t get you laid or repeat business (except by certain specific personality-types of girls).

Most advanced/pro PUAs have solid comfort/rapport/qualifying skills but unfortunately with the current “gimme a magic pill!!!” generation of noob PUAs no one is interested in buying those products. “spend 7 hours talking with the girl over coffee and eventually take her home and have sex with her” VS “go be obnoxious and loud and get head in the club bathroom!!!!” and all that.


  • Anon
    on July 9, 2012 at 6:05 pm
    Original Link

    “go be obnoxious and loud and get head in the club bathroom”

    LOL shit the only time I got head in a bathroom stall was because I was loud and obnoxious.
    I get the jist of what you’re saying but thanks for connecting these dots.


    • Obstinance Works
      on July 9, 2012 at 8:02 pm
      Original Link

      Night vs Day Game. You can pull drunken sluts for a same night lay if you are pushy, aggressive, and a little or a lot mean. It’s not hard at all if you aren’t scared. Day game is more artful and less bullyish.This has probably been discussed 10 million times already however.


      • YaReally
        on July 9, 2012 at 8:38 pm
        Original Link

        “You can pull chicks for a same night lay if you are pushy, aggressive, and a little or a lot mean.”

        Fixed what you wrote for ya.



Pulsotic
on July 9, 2012 at 6:05 pm
Original Link

I shit you not I used the “hand model” neg on saturday and banged her that night.

HER: I have a photoshoot in philly that weekend.
ME: What are you a hand model or something?
HER: What you don’t think I’m pretty enough to be a real model?

The rest of the night I ruthlessly mocked her flip flops which transitioned into contrasting me to all the douchebag guys wearing flip flops in bars. (I love the look of epiphany in their eyes when they realize they’re with the coolest guy there.)

Same night, outside the bar, watching some street musician’s with the model girl and two buddies, I stopped a cute girl (to boost my value to the model girl and for shiggles):

ME: Is that a Hello Kitty playing card tattoo? How old were you when you got that 16?
HER: Last year (blushing)
ME: Don’t worry I won’t judge you for the tattoo, I’ll judge you for those earings.

I forget the retarded wording, but I compared them to hoops that a dog jumps through. It sounds stupid here and even worse in person, but she was having fun and giving it back.
Anyway, there’s your neg of the day to use and abuse. Remember to not be an aspie.

[heartiste: good negs, solid banter, i want to see how good, solid and tight your game can get. for those who are wondering, this is similar to how gay guys sound when they're talking to their fag hags. and you wonder why the hottest chicks have so many gay guy friends? those homos know how to TEASE.]


  • Matthew King
    on July 10, 2012 at 12:54 pm
    Original Link

    I love the look of epiphany in their eyes when they realize they’re with the coolest guy there.

    “The Look of Epiphany” is a great turn of phrase. Poems should be written about it to get betas to understand what the goal is.

    There is no blinking, there are no micro-movements. The Look is still a casual focus, not quite a state of rapturous awe (that cums later), but it is the maximum enthrallment allowable in a public place without her complete loss of control. They do not hang on every word; in fact, the words become almost irrelevant, like the lyrics of a hypnotic tune. The expression is childlike, like a kid seeing her first rainbow.

    The result is surrender. I understand that PUAs want to focus on the score, but when the lay becomes one of many side-effects to the surrender, an entire world of options opens up to you. Going beyond the drunken trickery of coeds brings with it a calm, reducing beta anxiety and broadcasting an aloofness/serenity to which she responds with a deeper sexuality than any cocky routine or approach banter could ever achieve. You dominate with eye contact, and every defense is penetrated.

    Not that every brah should drop all the fundamentals and try to become a bug-eyed hypnotist. But journeymen should be aware that there are levels of dominance in pick up, and that they might achieve higher forms of mastery. One-note PUA.com types will scoff at this, as their audience is for recently eurekaed betas just trying to wrap their brains around all the knowledge heretofore hidden from them. Their game is quantity, and that approach is impervious against and mutually exclusive to the pursuit of quality.

    Matt


    • YaReally
      on July 10, 2012 at 5:44 pm
      Original Link

      “One-note PUA.com types will scoff at this”

      God you’re SO right. Us PUAs are fucking shallow idiots who only look at the surface and this amazingly eloquent description you gave of this phenomenon none of us have ever seen because we’re not as advanced as you just blew my mind.

      Except oh no wait, what you described is what we call “the doggy dinner bowl look” (in field reports it’s usually used like “she went DDB on me”). We started calling it that before The Game, and I can dig up Field Reports with the term that go back to 1999 and earlier.

      You are such a knob. You constantly talk about PUAs do this and PUAs think that and PUA focuses on these and you have clearly not studied more PUA teaching than glancing over The Game once lol

      Just please quit spreading misinformation about my community so you can “big-up” yourself on here. I will make you look like an idiot by calling you out on it every fucking time.


      • King A (Matthew King)
        on July 10, 2012 at 9:56 pm
        Original Link

        Oh. Your “community” had a three-letter acronym to describe it.

        I know I “look like an idiot” to those former-chumps who learned how to socialize with women from websites and seminar videos, whose every facet of human interaction must be catalogued in a nerd-manual glossary before being recognized legit. And true enough, I am not familiar with cutting-edge terminology from 1999 about stuff I learned “in the field” my freshman year of fucking high school.

        If you ceased your obsessive crusade to recruit all men to the church of Real Social Dynamics, you might notice that I described the phenomenon so that I could place it at a higher priority (total surrender) than your PUA.com puppetmasters allow you the latitude to accept. I promote it as an end-in-itself; you can only recognize it as one more tool to get already easy pussy. That’s exactly what I predicted sub-PUA blowhards like you would “scoff at,” and whattaya know, you obeyed obediently. Not unlike a “doggy” called to his “dish.”

        Do “dig up” those decade-old “Field Reports” for me, doggy, to prove your original discovery of what is, in fact, an immemorial sexual observation. The evolution of your obsessive insecurities would be a fascinating case study.

        And no, I have never cracked open The Game. I did however read his investigation into “your” “community,” back when STYLE was known more humbly as Neil Strauss, reporter. Neither his late-life conversion nor yours impresses me. I didn’t need to compare notes and codewords with outcasts who were isolated from normal, masculine rites of passage until adulthood.

        No matter how many times you fantasize about “calling out” the guy you resented in high school and making him “look like an idiot” years later, you can’t go back to be the dashing Senior Prom King with too many dates. You can only try ever more feverishly to compensate for those formative years that still haunt you. I understand your resentment toward people like me, who see right through your frantic playacting. But I can’t quite relate to its intensity.

        Matt


        • YaReally
          on July 11, 2012 at 6:58 pm
          Original Link

          bla bla bla lol

          Allow me to summarize your post: “I admit I haven’t done any real research or have any real understanding of PUA concepts and what they teach but I will continue to make broad generalizations in my posts about what PUAs think and what they teach.”

          At least you’re aware you’re full of shit, prom king lol


          • YaReally
            on July 13, 2012 at 5:20 pm
            Original Link

            tl;dr lol



LostSailor
on July 9, 2012 at 7:46 pm
Original Link

Had an “Ah-ha” moment last week with negs and inner game.

First date with an online prospect at a low-key but semi-well-known bar/restaurant in her neighborhood. She was late (‘natch) and I’d already finished my first drink at the bar and made friends with the bartender. She’s apologetic, blaming a sprained toe, but quite attractive, so I make a comment about getting her a mobility-scooter. We get a fresh round, staying at the bar, and I make sure I’m sitting three-quarters turned toward her. Chit-chat ensues.

I only realized later that the neg was completely unconscious, just a natural response:

Her: You’re actually much more attractive than your photos [true that; need to update them]

Me: Thanks. I thought your hair would be redder.

Her: Oh, well, yeah, it’s pretty flaming red in that photo, isn’t it? There were some others where it was darker, and it gets more red in the summer when I’ve been out in the sun, etc. etc. [she went on for a while like this]

Fifteen minutes later, she’s turned facing me, I have my leg between hers, foot perched on a rung of her bar stool, lots of touching [a part of Game that I've had trouble with, but not this night], teasing back and forth, etc.

An hour and a half later, we were making out like teenagers on the roof deck of her building overlooking the Hudson, ending with a finger-bang.

She’s making me dinner at her place tomorrow.

But in the cab on the way home, I realized that it was the neg about her hair that changed the tenor of the interaction. After working on myself and my Game for the last 18 months, it’s good to know that it’s finally really sinking in and becoming more of just a natural part of who I am.


  • ImmoralGables
    on July 9, 2012 at 8:41 pm
    Original Link

    Nice work brother keep it up. I doubt you at 18 months ago would of had the balls to push for the make out on the roof.


    • LostSailor
      on July 9, 2012 at 9:05 pm
      Original Link

      I would have always gone for the make-out. But the finger-bang in a public place–there were other people up there, though it was very dim lighting–that was a different thing. Had to stop because while she was really into it, it scared her a bit. Didn’t want to spook the kitty.

      I’ve always been pretty good at escalating once the making out starts, but to get to that point, I’ve had to re-learn, post-divorce, what I once knew in my 20s but never really knew that I knew. All in a very different environment.

      Seeing it all laid out here and other sites blew my mind at first. But thinking about it, I realized I’d gradually lost whatever latent “alpha” tendencies I’d had to massive beta tendencies during years of marriage. I can’t claim to have ever been a real alpha, though I had several natural alpha friends. More like a classic greater beta that I slowly lost.

      But, finally unplugged from the feminist matrix, it’s getting better day by day. Life is good.


      • Zorn
        on July 9, 2012 at 10:38 pm
        Original Link

        Some months ago I did a similar thing in my favourite bar, finger banged her to orgasm (she bit my shoulder to avoid shouting) on a couch while some hipsters and two bartenders looked at us astonished. It was an amazing relationship, sex was mindblowing. Later we broke up, but she will always remember that ballsy move.


        • YaReally
          on July 10, 2012 at 5:54 pm
          Original Link

          lol I fingered a chick leaning on a table (doggy-style, reached up under her skirt from behind) while her sister and GFs were talking to my friends and us while leaning on the other side of the table lol my buddies had no idea either and when I told them what was going on after they were like “I wondered why she was just standing there with a stupid grin on her face!!” lol

          I fucked up though, the bar had private bathrooms I could’ve snuck her away to to finish up but I was laughing so hard in my head at the situation and the potential chaos that I didn’t even think of it till after they had left lol this was all within 30 min of meeting them and the girl approached me so it was easy to escalate the situ fast so I’m posting this more as a “keep up what you guys are doing, you can do crazier shit than you even imagine right now :) ” encouragement rather than bragging cause all I did was escalate on iois and position us optimally. Fast escalation is my main forte



theoak
on July 10, 2012 at 11:07 am
Original Link

how do you expect femcunts and blue pillers to understand negs when even ‘red pillers’ dont? look at the comments in this thread, a bunch of guys bragging about the “awesome negs” they have used. if you are that focused on finding the perfect neg you are going to be too invested in her reaction so it will come off as insecure and approval seeking.

good negs are the tiny little zings that neither of you really even notice as they are happening but at the end of the convo she is thinking ‘wow, he is really judgemental. he must have ridiculously high standards for women. hot girls must throw themselves at him. swoon. i need to hit the gym more and get implants.”

i love it when girls bring up “negs” that made their hamster spin on overdrive since the last time i saw them, that i didnt even realize i had said.


  • YaReally
    on July 10, 2012 at 6:03 pm
    Original Link

    Yep, this is an important point.

    When negging was a new concept we had routines for it but it wasn’t the routines themselves that made it work, it was what they suggested about the overall status/psyche of the man saying them. We didn’t have a wide enough scope to grasp this back then but the PUA community understands this now.

    But, to cut people some slack, the “show a girl you aren’t impressed by her like every other guy” concept is fucking mind-blowing to newbies learning about the matrix. It’s such a crazy backwards concept that they need a lot of examples of it in action to really grasp the idea.

    As a newbie, what you should be doing is taking all of the negs you read about and are interested in and ignore the words…look at the structure and the bigger overall picture, what are the overall consistent similarities across the board? This is what separates the pro PUAs from the dabblers…Mystery, Style, Tyler, they were guys who were looking for the deeper spiderweb connections in the surface level stuff their followers were happy regurgitating, that’s why they did so much ground-breaking stuff for game.



Centaur
on July 10, 2012 at 11:39 am
Original Link

The reason why PUAs get all the criticism they do, is due to the fact that PUAs spend every other sentence insulting everyone who isn’t a pua, or ego tripping about how awesome they are compared to all those “betas” and “losers” out there.
In almost every blog or forum I read, PUAs spend and inordinate amount of time calling married men “betas” or “losers”. They call men who don’t game losers, or just pussies. There is also this ridiculous need to label everyone a beta and preen on and on about how alpha they are.
Imagine- people getting rubbed the wrong way when they are being insulted. As a natural consequence many men either turn off the whole thing, or those still in it- guys like me who enjoy game- spend an inordinate amount of time trying to bring everyone back down to earth. PUAs should welcome the criticism, because it makes Game adapt and grow.
The Neg is a perfect example. When the idea first came out, it was all about taking advantage of every womens insecurities. I remember reading how Negs were deliberately a way to be a little insulting to women so as to lower her value and make her more insecure. Over time, after much criticism, the Neg has evolved to what is described here- a way to tease and have fun, a way to show you are comfortable with yourself and not needy. But lets be honest, thaqt is not how it was described and practiced early on, The concept has evolved- and it is all the better for it.
I have seen Game proclaimed to be answer to everything from mens rights to fucking hair loss. It may help to step down from the high horse a bit, and be a little less self aggrandizing.


  • YaReally
    on July 10, 2012 at 6:23 pm
    Original Link

    “I remember reading how Negs were deliberately a way to be a little insulting to women so as to lower her value and make her more insecure.”

    Then you remember wrong:

    http://www.pickupguide.com/neg-hit-theory/

    That’s from 1999. Relevant shit:

    “***A NEG HIT is a qualifier.*** The girl is FAILING to meet your high expectations. It’s not an insult, just a judgement call on your part. The better looking the girl, the more aggressive you must be with using neg hits. A 10 can get 3 neg hits up front, while an 8 only 1 or 2 over a longer time. You CAN go overboard if they think you are BETTER than them You can drop the self-esteem right from under them (just like most 10s do to guys) and this isn’t good. You have to get as close to the breaking point as you can without crossing the line. Once you have gotten her RIGHT THERE, you can start appreciating things about her (NEVER LOOKS). There is a mutual RESPECT now. Something most guys never get from the girl.”

    It was never about insulting her, it was always about qualification. Yes the result was it tripped a glitch in her self-esteem but that self-esteem was based on a retarded value system (“everyone wants to fuck meeeee”) to begin with. He warns AGAINST dropping their self-esteem out from under them and advises not to use negs on average girls and he explains the difference between a neg and an insult and explains the type of girl and psyche that negs are meant for.

    These guys were hitting on rich socialite 10s in posh LA nightclubs, not the chick in sneakers at your local pub, when they were talking about advanced stuff like this.

    “They call men who don’t game losers, or just pussies.”

    Can’t speak for other PUAs but a pet peeve of mine is people who misrepresent our teaching either due to ill intentions (King A) or lack of understanding/research (lots of people, especially the anti-gamer and MRA and game dabbler types).

    We’re only arrogant because we know our shit. When a guy who’s been married for 10 years and hasn’t laid a hot chick off a cold approach in years spouts off how things “really” work it’s like no, shut up, you are just mentally masturbating and there are newbies who won’t understand that you’re full of shit and you will lead them off course from fixing their dating lives lol


    • Centaur
      on July 11, 2012 at 1:11 am
      Original Link

      “We’re only arrogant because we know our shit.”-YaReally
      In my life as a musician I have met and played with some of the worlds most accomplished musicians ever. Literally, some names you’ve probably heard of. To a one, and I can not think of one exception, they have all been some of the least arrogant and humblest, beautiful human beings I have ever met.
      The same applies to many of the doctors I work with in my “day job”. The best doctors, the ones everyone goes to for answers and when the shit hits the fan, are the ones for whom the word arrogance would never apply. Confident, in control, secure..yes. Arrogant? No
      The claim that arrogance is a result of “knowing your shit” is something that can only fly with someone with no experience with people who truly “know their shit”. Arrogance is, and always will be, the sign of a poser, a wanna be an insecure pretender. Always.
      And people sense this…


      • YaReally
        on July 11, 2012 at 7:08 pm
        Original Link

        I am 100% not concerned with Internet people thinking I’m arrogant. I’m not here to sugarcoat everything so the newbie who keeps making excuses to stay in and read this website instead of going out and interacting with the real world can feel good about himself and be coddled. I also don’t care if he ignores what I say because I’m not stroking his self-esteem cock as I say it cause quite frankly I can only think of maybe 5 guys max in this comment section who I can tell are actually trying to work on themselves. The rest are just happy mentally masturbating.

        I’m just presenting how shit works to counter the Jockey Theory in here.



Firepower
on July 10, 2012 at 11:42 am
Original Link

heartiste:
The difference between a sour grapes disqualification and a cool-as-fuck disqualification is timing. When you’re chasing — when you’re on the losing end of a pickup attempt

This is one of your best (recent) Game posts.

Juggler has (and tenmagnet) a credible link to the original founders.

With their vacating the stage, not much remains worth spending the time on reading.

Noobs just can’t perceive (in our endlessly talky internet world)
that Mystery, DD, TD and Style DID write The Book and 98% of ALL you need to know is written there. They ARE the last word – esp Mystery and Style.

As a side note, I can’t recall the names of the strip-club bouncer who looked like Wolverine and his hippie-looking partner; each had various nom de plumes in Style’s tome. That pair were Masters of presenting themselves. I remember Style was highly impressed by them.


  • YaReally
    on July 10, 2012 at 6:29 pm
    Original Link

    “Noobs just can’t perceive (in our endlessly talky internet world) that Mystery, DD, TD and Style DID write The Book and 98% of ALL you need to know is written there. They ARE the last word – esp Mystery and Style.”

    Yup. That’s why the manosphere was so intriguing to me. Like take this Juggler post. This concept of not giving it all away was PUA standard knowledge loooong before The Game was published. This is an old as fuck idea but it’s being presented as if it’s new and a ton of guys are like “wow this is genius!! I never thought of this!!”

    But if they went and read the old school books and the Fast Seduction archives of the top PUAs they’d find thousands and thousands of posts and descriptions and breakdowns of all of this stuff.

    Modern PUA does expand on the old school concepts. Tyler Durden’s “The Blueprint” is the best example of this but RSD in general has done a great job of zooming out the scope for the bigger picture and mixing self-help and inner-game in there.

    But the oldschool Mystery Method is still 100% as solid as it was back in the day.

    Again this comes from PUA not being based in “theory”. It’s based in practice and experience. If Mystery found that Negs don’t work or Juggler found that it was better to tell all about yourself right away, that’s what the PUA teachings would reflect. All we care about is what consistently works in real life.



Chubby Chaser Olympics: The Most Special

Original Link

via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 6, 2012 at 8:05 pm
Original Link

A lot of naturals with game who have high sex drives will end up with fatties. The ease of the lay comes before the hotness of the girl to them. So they’ll get a phone number from the smokin’ hottie who’ll be a nightmare of logistics and game-playing and flaking, but take the fatty that’s been following them around all night home at 2am because they know she’ll be an easy lay.

Most high sex drive naturals I’ve met fuck amazingly hot women most guys can’t get, but will just as soon turn around and fuck an uggo no other guy would touch. The non-needy vibe these guys give off (because they get laid so frequently, whether it’s by hot girls or uggos) is actually what helps them land the super hot girls while the guy not macking on uggos because “I have high standards” end up putting more pressure on the interaction when they DO talk to a hot girl so they give off a needy vibe and she shoots them down.

This again comes down to the Thrill of the Hunt VS Pleasure of Sex types of men:

http://www.pua-zone.com/showthread.php?2541-Thrill-of-the-Hunt-men-vs-Pleasure-of-Sex-men

fucking lol’ed at the black guy part. So true. I always laugh when I see the massive 300lbs white chicks dancing in front of the wall of jacked up decent looking black guys, and then those guys are all over it lol I can’t even wrap my head around how that must work in the bedroom.

I actually find I’ve met enough girls that I can spot girls who are into black guys. Not based on just being fatty fats lol but the way they do their makeup, hair, accessories, etc. usually gives it away…which is a shame ’cause I like their style a lot of the time.



Donation Nation

Original Link

via Heartiste

(R)Evoluzione
on July 6, 2012 at 6:14 pm
Original Link

Don’t apologize for the science. It’s the entire reason we’re able to communicate with scraps of electrical energy across time & space, and it needs no apology nor explanation for its explication.


  • King A (Matthew King)
    on July 7, 2012 at 2:47 pm
    Original Link

    It’s the entire reason we’re able to communicate with scraps of electrical energy across time & space…

    Entire reason? BZZZT. False.

    Even if it were true, what is the reason why “it’s the entire reason”? That’s the level of conversation occurring above your pay grade, son. Don’t break your brain.

    Just to demonstrate the qualitative difference between my discussion and yours, I will predict you respond (if at all) with obvious question begging, along the lines of, “Everything that constitutes our current felicitous circumstances owes itself to the hard sciences, therefore the hard sciences are responsible for our felicity.” This is a faith in science, not science per se. This is assertion, rather than observation based on a measurable control and experiment — a.k.a., the scientific method.

    It is one of the reasons the blog has limited itself. The wisdom of game is yearning to grow past those areas of knowledge that do not depend on falsification and reproducible experimentation. Some observations are better communicated poetically rather than numerically, as CH’s best ones are. After all, is this the seduction “arts” or the seduction “sciences”? If you cannot understand the utility of both with regard to a particular circumstance, you are using half your toolbox at best.

    Insofar as your religion of science allows you to believe more deeply in the phenomena you have otherwise confirmed through experience, it is a useful foundation that allows you to concentrate on the framing and decoration of game structure. It is not grounded in the manner you say, but it is indeed grounded. The problem only occurs when you start delving into that foundation and attempt to replace sturdy if hoary beams with shiny-veneered particleboard. Best to just steer clear of the basement. It’s dark and disorienting down there. Concentrate on building a better gargoyle.

    Matt


    • (R)Evoluzione
      on July 7, 2012 at 4:40 pm
      Original Link

      Gee, Matt, you’re right. Solid state circuitry truly belongs to the realm of angels and demons, it was a happy accident that humans discovered them. And the Earth is really only 5000 years old, and dinosaurs were put here by an angry god to confuse teh scientists and to test our faith.

      And it’s also not possible for anything to be both art and science. Science never informs the arts, never-ever. Nor can science inform religion. That would be like some sort of heresy. It says so in the bible, I’m sure, and you will quote the good book like a good little churchian to show us heathens the errors of our ways. The briliance of your words will cause tens, or hundreds, of would-be PUA gamesmen to put down their copies of The Game and instead flock to summer bible camp somewhere in the oppressive heat of the bible belt, preferably in Oklahoma.


      • King A (Matthew King)
        on July 7, 2012 at 5:30 pm
        Original Link

        Right, d-bag. Because I recognize the limits of the scientific method, I must immediately believe “[s]olid state circuitry truly belongs to the realm of angels and demons.” You didn’t even get to the level where you could make your tautological error.

        You have to put away this pathetic little straw man against which you bounce your borrowed, inane theories. I am right here, flesh and blood, mind and speech. I didn’t make a single citation to the bible. I didn’t call upon angels or demons. I said nothing of the church, and I told no “would-be PUA gamesmen to put down their copies of The Game.”

        My argument was epistemological, Socratic, and completely agnostic. I asked a simple question — how do you know you know? — and all you can do is sputter about superstitions in reply. You import your knowledge of my incidental traits to create a contention that wasn’t there, to engage a thesis you can handle.

        You are a repetitive mouth-advertisement for a creed you have never examined, beyond a stream of irrelevant ad hominem against other creeds who have the courage to posit directly what they take on faith. You have no idea where your “science” ends and your faith begins.

        Let me try to condescend to terms you understand: saying Almighty Science “entire[ly]” created the ability to communicate electronically is like saying Al Gore created the internet. The investigative qualities of the scientific method played an important role, but men would never have been around to employ that method had they not decided the universe is comprehensible and admits itself to be experimented upon. Now whyever would the West do that, and not, say the Sioux tribe or Black Africa? Why, for all the discoveries and inventions of Arabia and the Orient, did the exponential explosion of progressive technology exclusively occur in the West? (White people’s genes! say the dissident HBD sectarians.)

        Further, science does not magically transmogrify into technology. The elements of capital, foresight, and initiative must be present in a free environment for the dormant seed of knowledge to grow into a plant of utility. You unconsciously discount these elements, you are therefore not curious about them, and you have lost the ability to recognize their importance, as your Faith in Science operates like a magical incantation: We Owe Gratitude to Science for What Is Good in Our Lives. If it is not true it is not scientific; if it is not scientific it is not true. Science Himself created these technologies ex nihilo, and it is blasphemous to attribute other causes to their origin, such as the artistry and drive of their inventors.

        These are the matters that must engage your mind before you can belittle me or my faith. If you give some evidence that you can interact with me at that level, I will give your rote, regurgitated criticism a hearing.

        Matt


        • YaReally
          on July 9, 2012 at 12:41 am
          Original Link

          lol

          “is like saying Al Gore created the internet.”

          Look, I can’t argue with what you’re saying directly, so if I twist your shit around or snip out a tiny quote or en extremely vague “jist” then what you’re saying is LIKE this other thing that’s obviously ridiculous and easy to argue with and isn’t actually what you said at all. Now I’m going to argue with myself for 10 paragraphs!

          I didn’t even read what the debate is about, this pattern is just funny to me lol


    • YaReally
      on July 9, 2012 at 12:34 am
      Original Link

      lol

      “I will predict you respond (if at all) with obvious question begging, along the lines of…”

      Here’s what I’ve decided you might say and now I’m going to argue against myself for 10 paragraphs.

      You’re still doing it. :)



Donation Nation

Original Link

via Heartiste

Obstinance Works
on July 7, 2012 at 1:25 pm
Original Link

Advice needed fellow BUTHEXXERS! Exchanged messages with this chick

http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=41674142

Yeah I know she’s old but her body is a bang’n.

We talked about a 3some she’s all in. She tried to get a dude to join, I said hell no and she’s like “ok.”

Anyway she wanted me to come over at 5 am to fuck her and she meets me in front of her crammed apartment complex in her black panties. Wow. Anyway I was pretty drunk so I was acting like an ass and I said something about her being old and she got pissed and kicked me out and threated to shoot me with her “loaded gun.”

Anyway I sent some sweet little texts back to her like 12 hours apart and she finally gave in and told me she’s gonna “get back to me.” I texted back to “Let me know little hottie.” So how should I play this, pissies? Just sit tight and wait or sext her shit like “i want to fuck you with my throbbing cock” or what? She’s a Hellcat from Hell’s Kitchen, if you know where that is.

For sure I’m not really gonna make any small talk when I get with her for more than 30 seconds. Going straight to fuck’n this time like she wanted!


  • YaReally
    on July 7, 2012 at 3:40 pm
    Original Link

    She’s going to shoot you. srs.



The Origin of Alpha

Original Link

via Rational Male

YaReally
on July 3rd, 2012 at 3:41 pm
Original Link

“all of those efforts’ latent purpose is to return a man back to that primal Alpha energy the five-year-old you had in spades.”

Very important point that guys who don’t study PUA shit beyond the surface but make judgements about it (there’s a couple in this very comment thread lol) and newbies-intermediates to pickup don’t understand is that while it looks like we’re teaching guys to do new things we’re actually just removing restrictions society placed on them. We give them routines to make this easier but most advanced PUAs hit a point years in after lots of success where they go “wait a sec, this isn’t building up its tearing down…holy shit!” and actually fully understand what that means.

Go further back than 5 years old. When you were a month old, when you were hungry you cried to get food, you didn’t give a shit who was around or how appropriate it was to be doing. Down the road you were taught not to cause a scene in public or demand what you want until you’re in the appropriate conditions.

When you were a month old, you calmed down and enjoyed it when you were comforted and touched by other human beings. Down the road you were taught not to invade people’s personal space and about sexual harassment and lawsuits and boys and girls have separate change rooms etc.

When you were a month old, you’d talk to (or attempt to interact with) anyone interesting around you. You’d stare them in the eyes curious and wanting to figure them out. Down the road you were taught not to talk to strangers and that eye contact is rude and can lead to violence.

When you were able to finally speak, if someone was ugly you had no problem letting them know your honest opinion. If you liked or didn’t like something (people, vegetables, ice cream, cartoons) you made sure people knew it. Down the road you were taught to hold back your opinions to not offend anyone and to be open minded to things you knew you didnt like and to not be rude etc.

People don’t realize how far back social conditioning goes. It wasn’t just watching a few Disney movies that made a beta who he is. All that alpha shit is still in guys, but the social conditioning for some guys is way deeper than for other guys. The alpha Buddhas were never really conditioned. The natural alphas were partly conditioned. The learned alphas overcame and eliminate their conditioning. The beta nerds dont know they’re conditioned. The feminist-guys and lame emo weiner guys dive head first into conditioning lol


Men Aren’t Attracted to High-Earning Women

Original Link

via Heartiste

YaReally
on July 3, 2012 at 2:42 pm
Original Link

lol fucking love these chicks. I’m actually focusing more on them as of this summer cause I’m in a city with a ton of corporate women. Ages 28-40 making tons of bank. They have nothing to spend their $ on except making themselves look better (clothes, surgery, tanning, esthetics, etc) and a man. They’re just sitting on tons of money dying to have someone to spend it on.

The downside is they’re retarded like the comment girl in this article where they still think they’re as high value a catch as they were when they were 20 and they have layers and layers of Disney fantasies built up about what they deserve and a Sex & The City view of how empowered they should be etc etc.

So there’s a lot of retarded shit to barrel thru lol but they buy me things and drive me around in their fancy cars and have swank expensive condos to bang in and they pay for dinner and alcohol so it balances out to me. :)

Btw this type of chick using online dating is shooting herself in the foot. The shit that’s actually attractive to her won’t come thru on an okcupid profile. It’s like a guy saying “okay all the girls who want me to choose them come over with zits on your face and your hair messy and wearing a moo-moo”. By default all those guys are starting at a disadvantage but because she’s deluded herself via feminism and anti-game to not accept that the alpha janitor could rock her world better than the beta $500k/yr guy she’ll forever be stuck in a cycle of dissatisfaction till she buys enough cats to keep her content.



Backwards to Zero

Original Link

via Rational Male

YaReally
on July 3rd, 2012 at 1:51 pm
Original Link

I actually don’t care if someone goes out as long as what they’re saying aligns with what guys who go out regularly have experienced.

ie – I imagine Roissy and Rollo don’t go out trying to pick up poon these days, I know Rollo is married and all that. But the things they describe/teach other men on their blogs like 95% line up with the combined experiences of tens of thousands of PUAs. So I like their blogs and appreciate what they’re doing for men. And when occasionally they hit that other 5% it’s usually not due to ignorant beliefs but just misunderstanding something or not being aware of some nuances that are explained in PUA literature and that’s where I like to clear things up or elaborate on them in the comments.

Then you have certain commenters who are obsessed with espousing their own limited world view as if it was the truth. They’ve been around the sphere for a while, they have a following of Jockeys who are more beta than them, they have a reputation and an ego, and they speak very authoritatively and are used to the poor betas reading sphere blogs and not going out listening to them. These guys don’t go out regularly, they just spout their theories that are tainted and twisted around their limiting beliefs.

How do I know those guys don’t go out regularly? Because if they did they would end up coming to the same conclusions the guys who go out regularly do. It’s that simple. If you still think money matters, you haven’t gone out enough and pushed yourself enough (be poor for a while and pick up, pick up while telling girls you work at McDonald’s, go out dressed like a slob and pick up, etc) and you haven’t met enough people (make friends with people in poor social circles and hang with the alphas in those groups) because if you did all that you’d come to the same conclusion the thousands of PUAs who HAVE done all that have come to.

If everyone else says the sky is blue and you’ve been living in a cave all your life and are running around demanding everyone accept your belief that the sky is green, that’s the indication you don’t leave your cave. Because if you left your cave you’d see, like everyone else outside, that the sky is blue.

It really is this simple, and I think it’s a shame that there are comment readers in the manosphere legitimately looking for help to improve their lives and they’re forced to risk getting sidetracked by authoritative Keyboard Jockey commenters. You are wasting their time and actually ruining other men’s life and keeping them from reaching their potential. That is sad and annoying to me because the rest of society already filled these guys with bullshit beliefs to hold them back, the manosphere isn’t a place where that should keep happening.

To paraphrase Tyler: PUAs encourage going out because we know the field fixes you. If you dress like shit the bouncer won’t let you in so you’re forced to look at the scene and learn a bit about fashion and social awareness. If you stutter, girls walk away, and you learn to start snuffing out the stuttering and sound more confident. If you’re quiet, girls will walk away when they can’t hear you over the music so you learn to make your voice carry. When you’re too shy to touch a girl she loses interest so you learn to kino properly. When you fuck a chick and you’re out of breath in 30 seconds because you’re a fat fuck you learn to work out and be healthier so you can enjoy sex more.

And down the road when you have some relationships, if you haven’t internalized alpha traits and become alpha you’ll lose girlfriends because they’ll see the incongruence/faking so you learn to internalize traits. You’ll lose girlfriends because you’ll play too many games and learn that there are points where you can tone down all the game playing. You’ll lose girlfriends because you looked at them as sex objects instead of people and learn to build comfort and get to know and love them as human beings. You’ll lose social circles because you shat where you eat and had no self control and fucked a buddy’s girlfriend and you’ll learn to control your impulses and create your own set of rules you live by. You’ll lose buddies because you got into fights over girls and you’ll learn to chill out and not look at guys as competion especially your friends. You’ll realize you have a bunch of shallow relationships because the guys only know you as a “bar buddy” and not a real friend and you’ll learn to make an effort to see them outside of the bars and develop real friendships.

So ya, we encourage guys, ESPECIALLY newbies, but old-timers as well, to go out regularly. The field is merciless and will shove all your shortcomings in your face over and over until you fix them.

And when you fix them? You end up agreeing with the stuff thousands of PUAs have been saying. When you haven’t fixed them and don’t go out so your sticking points and limiting beliefs aren’t shoved in your face to see? Well, you become a “vet” on these comment sections espousing bullshit advice to newbies who don’t have the experience to know better yet. How’s that for charm lol


YaReally
on July 3rd, 2012 at 2:07 pm
Original Link

Also as you get older new sticking points and limited beliefs surface, especially if you only had some success back in your youth and it’s been years since you’ve legit been “in the field” seducing women and cold approaching etc. and that’s fine as long as you’re aware that that happens to you. But most of the old time “vets” I’ve seen around here don’t realize that. They’re the former high school jock still talking about the winning touchdown they once threw and think they can just hop out on the field for a professional game of football despite now having beer guts and can’t get out of their armchair without effort.

If you stop working out and eating right your body won’t keep it’s 6-pack giant muscled physique you had at your prime. Social/seduction skills work the same way. And just like working out and eating healthy, you learn to enjoy it and it’s not a struggle or chore or work anymore.